Some of the many species Jeffrey Combs has evolved into:

    • mipadaitu@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      Hot tip, change HIS last name prior to the wedding and she gets the name change free.

      I know a couple that waited until after the wedding to do that and the husband changed his name, then the wife was given the option of keeping her old name, or switch to his old name.

      She ended up having to go through the entire name change process without the benefit of the auto-name flip from the marriage.

      • bitchkat@lemmy.world
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        7 days ago

        I’m pretty sure both of us had the option of changing our names when we got married and when we got divorced.

      • Norah - She/They@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        6 days ago

        This is really interesting, because in my state in Australia, this process isn’t gendered at all. The man can take the woman’s name just as easily, same with same-sex marriages.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      7 days ago

      I’ve known other people who do that.

      I just feel like any name change that you don’t need (i.e. you’re transitioning) is just more bother than it’s worth.

      • BradleyUffner@lemmy.world
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        7 days ago

        Yeah, that’s what we are running into. The marriage forms here in NC make it simple to take the husband’s last name as part of the process, but any other kind of change requires a lot of crazy, expensive, and time consuming steps.

  • bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    For someone who gives this much of a shit about gender roles, you’d think they’d learn the correct forms of the word for an intended spouse.

  • TheGrandNagus@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    My wife took my name, but I would not give the slightest shit if she didn’t, which I made clear to her at the time.

    We briefly discussed having a double-barrel surname, but writing that out would be a mild inconvenience that neither of us want.

    And maybe this is a dumb question, but what happens when forename surnameA-surnameB marries or has children with forename surnameX-surnameY?

    What is the resulting name? forename surnameA-surnameB-surnameX-surnameY? Do they pick one of each, e.g. A-X?

    • Steak@lemmy.ca
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      5 days ago

      Yeah hyphenating is not progressive at all. And I should know, I have a goatee.

  • Pickle_Jr@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    7 days ago

    There are tons of reasons why one might not want to change their name. At a minimum you have to send a form to the state, update any licenses you have, contact your banks, your insurance, your place of work… Best case scenario it’s an annoying hassle to deal with.

    Was I appreciative when my wife took my name? Sure. But that’s mostly because we also share the same first name so it’s hilarious to share the same last name. But I told her many times before we got married she didn’t need to do it. I never expected that out of her.

    If having a matching name is a big deal with you, then you can change your name.

    • ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works
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      7 days ago

      If having a matching name is a big deal with you, then you can change your name.

      ‘Why should I have to change? He’s the one who sucks!’ -Michael Bolton

    • Rubanski@lemm.ee
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      7 days ago

      You both share three same first name as well? That sounds very confusing for your peers

    • garibaldi_biscuit@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      It seems reasonable for each partner to continue to use their original family name if they want to, even if it’s only the husband’s name on the marriage certificate.

      If you go down the legally hyphenated name path, after a few generations, this could potentially devolve to family names like: Jones-Smith - Smythe-Johns - Longbottom-Allcock - Junior III (etc).

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      Yeah my wife has agreed that taking my name would be nice, but it’s a pain in the ass. And omg yes I love your attitude. Part of why I wanted to share a last name is so we can be Ms. and Mrs. Lastname.

  • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    My maiden name was awful to have. Other people liked it because it looked cool, but it was a hassle for everything even in the US, where at least part of it was well known. I then moved to Germany, where it was just totally foreign.

    My married name is under three syllables (vs more than eight), easy to spell, and sounds as German as possible. My husband would have loved to take my last name, but we couldn’t do it the way we wanted to (German naming laws 🙃). I would really have liked to at least have been able to keep my maiden name as a middle name, but alas.

    I still feel very weird (about a year out) about it, but there are way more good feelings than bad.

    However, it’s really annoying that people now assume I’m German. I put in a shit load of work to learn German well as an adult, and my strongest skill is in pronunciation. That combined with my name means people think I’m just a native German who’s bad at grammar, and they don’t correct me anymore.

    I always wanted to blend in as a native, I just didn’t think about the middle stretch where I just seem a bit dumb to others, both because of the language and cultural things that people now expect me to know (I thought it was called handkäse because you can eat the little rounds straight from the hand, no need for bread, until last year).

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      6 days ago

      I have a German surname, but my family changed the pronunciation to sound lest German during WWII so now Germans pronounce it “wrong” and no one else can pronounce it at all.

      • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        I read most of my news, so it took about a month to realize the VP candidates last name was pronounced “Walls,” so you’re among company.

        I’m from Connecticut, which has a town called Berlin, pronounced BURR-lun (/‘bərlən/). That , like the pronunciation of many German-origin names, was changed during WWII, but it’s basically a shibboleth for locals now, like Houston Street.

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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          6 days ago

          I’m in Indiana and half of our place names are pronounced incorrectly.

          Ver-sayles (Versailles)
          Rooshaville (Russiaville)
          Pee-ru (Peru) Kay-roh (Cairo)

          And, of course, we’re the home of the University of Note’r Daym.

          • stringere@sh.itjust.works
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            6 days ago

            Saint Louis would like some words:

            Bellefontaine (BELL-fountain)

            Cabanne (CAB-a-knee)

            Chouteau (SHOW-toe)

            Carondelet (kron-duh-let)

            Cote Brilliante (coat BRILL-yunt)

            DeTonty (duh-TON-tee)

            Dougherty Ferry (DOOR-uh-tee ferry)

            DeBaliviere (duh-BALL-uh-ver)

            Goethe (GO-thee)

            Gravois (GRAV-oy)

            Gratiot (GRASH-it)

            Hodiamont (HOAD-uh-mont)

            Juniata (june-ee-AH-tuh)

            Kossuth (KOSS-ooth)

            Laclede (lah-CLEED)

            Spoede (SPAY-dee)

            Tesson Ferry (TESS-on ferry)

            Zumbehl (ZUM-bull)

    • quafeinum@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      German here. Took my wife’s name because she has publications and I don’t. I have no idea what you are talking about. In Germany any partner can take the others name in a marriage or even have a compound name (maiden name - new name). My father took my mother’s name, they divorced 20 years ago, now my father is going to change his name back to his old name. My sister married her girlfriend, she took her name. Idk at this point it kinda became our internal family joke thing although our last name wasn’t that horrible

      • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        I already had a compound name, and we both have middle names, which are the relevant problems to combining our names the way we wanted.

        In Germany, you can’t have a twice hyphenated name (not that I wanted one), nor can you use that hyphenated name as an additional middle name, if you already have one.

        • quafeinum@lemmy.world
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          6 days ago

          Ah ok thanks for explaining. That makes sense that although they redid the law that there’s still idiotic shit I it that doesn’t work in real life.

  • S_H_K@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    6 days ago

    What a narrow view. In other many places things are different and they function you know. In Brazil kids get the mother’s surname.

  • Mango@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    What the fuck makes my name any better than hers? Fuck my name. I don’t even want it.

          • Joeffect@lemmy.world
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            7 days ago

            Oh, how progressive! Why, back in my day, we just thrilled at the excitement of folding laundry and baking pies all day. But you, dear, you’ve truly broken boundaries. Imagine—your wife letting you take her last name and do whatever you want! Why, next thing we know, she might let you wear trousers too.

            Give her my regards; she sounds like quite the visionary!

        • MintyAnt@lemmy.world
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          7 days ago

          Did you try taking discommendation, being expelled from the empire, brain wiping your brother and only living relative, and impressing her in combat during shared captivity in an enemy camp? If it works for worf…

  • LittleFeather@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    5 days ago

    Everyone has funny or unique stories about last names… Some people change their names for love, others keep them for work, and some even mix them up for fun. It’s like having many characters in one story, just like Jeffrey Combs does in acting—each name choice has its special vibe

  • groupofcrows@lemmy.ca
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    7 days ago

    When discussing marriage with my girlfriend (now wife), she mentioned not wanting to change her name. I told her this wasn’t acceptable - I expected her to change her name. But she repeated not wanting to change her last name. I told her she misunderstood, I didn’t want her to change her last name, I wanted her to change her first name to “groupofcrows property”, she can keep her last name. She did not accept this. (Yes this was a real conversation, yes we have been married for 7 years, no she did not change her name)

  • SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org
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    7 days ago

    I just see it as a hassle. Like why even bother? She would have to explain why she wants to take my name and I would try talking her out of it “What if we get a divorce in 7 years or so? Do you just have to change it back then?” I’m sure that would go over well