• Kraivo@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    If someone dumps me on a first date over my phone then so be it. It actually looks like dodging a bullet.

      • jballs@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        On a serious note, Aziz Ansari (Tom Haverford from Parks and Rec) has a pretty good book called Modern Romance that’s worth a read. When he does standup, he’ll have a volunteer from the audience swipe though their Tinder (or Bumble or whatever) matches. The amount of trivial stuff that people dismiss potential partners for is absolutely amazing. People will be like “they’re a Bears fan, swipe left.”

        So people could be compatible on 999/1000 different levels, but our methods of online dating almost allow too much choice, because people feel like they should hold out to find someone who matches 1000/1000.

    • Empricorn@feddit.nl
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      11 months ago

      I would love to say “use whatever you like”, but these Apple sycophants are ridiculous. They literally judge people because of the color of a text bubble! It’s like saying “both US political parties are bad”. Like, yeah: one party is flawed, but the other wants to destroy Democracy…

  • CADmonkey@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Men, proudly drag that battered and cracked android phone out on the first date, it’s a litmus test for shallow people, apparently.

    I went on a first date with a girl I met from work. She farted loud enough to be heard over drunken yelling and music in the steakhouse we were in, immediately after saying “I don’t get embarassed”.

    In a couple of weeks, we will have been together for 16 years. We’ve been married for 14 years. We cook together every evening, we hold each other whenever we are in the same room for more than five minutes, and on the rare nights where we aren’t taking each other’s clothes off, we fall asleep wrapped around each other. I would have missed out on a perfect relationship if I had judged her for a phone.

    • 𝔇𝔦𝔬@lemy.lol
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      11 months ago

      In your situation, it had nothing to do with a phone, haha. Swell on you for not judging her though.

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          I take it with a grain of salt because he’s a humorist, but in Dave Barry Does Japan, his wife tells him at one point, “I heard three farts today. It’s okay here.” I haven’t read that book in decades and I still remember that line because I thought, how nice to live in a place where people don’t hide basic bodily functions.

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      11 months ago

      But you see, you had genders swapped here. It’s OK for a woman to show hers, just don’t show yours (/s, obviously)

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        11 months ago

        /s but not really. Men aren’t supposed to have standards when it comes to women according to many women

        • guyrocket@kbin.social
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          11 months ago

          Aren’t allowed to have standards…cuz womenz can do absolutely anything and men MUST luuuurve them…right?

  • gatelike@feddit.de
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    11 months ago

    the best move is to show your android phone in your profile pics so you don’t get trapped with someone so shallow

  • Windex007@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Holy shit I’ve got some boomer energy, here:

    The reason to not take out your phone isn’t because someone might hate on your phone.

    You don’t take out your phone on a date so that you can be giving that person your full attention.

    • Tlaloc_Temporal@lemmy.ca
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      11 months ago

      There are lots of reasons for using a smartphone beyond avoiding engaging in conversation though. Looking things up, sharing contact info, planning another date, paying for the meal/event, even going to a movie can almost require an app.

      I’m not saying these would be the majority of the time or anything, but not using your phone whatsoever is more of a limitation than you’d think.

      • callouscomic@lemm.ee
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        11 months ago

        People with existing family trying to date, like a single parent checking on their kids. For sure the blanket no phone attitude is unrealistic.

      • Windex007@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Despite the boomer energy, I’m not actually one.

        It’s only been 2 years since my last “first date”. I know the world moves pretty fast, but I’d be shocked to discover that in the last 24 months the world went from “can be traversed without looking at your phone” to not.

        I guess I’d turn it around on you: NOT using your phone is NOT as much of a limitation as you’d think.

        Also, so many stupid things we do on our phone are things that could be an interaction with your date instead. What WAS that movie with Brendan Fraser with The Rock? Where IS that restaurant with no lights and all the servers are blind? What time is it? What direction is the river from here? What nationality is Santa Claus? How far north would we have to go so that Zombies would be frozen solid for at least 3 months per year? The point of a date is to attempt to form a bond, and it’s the shared journey that gets you there, not the successful and efficient completion of independent tasks.

        Obviously, if the only way to pay for the meal is to tap your phone, tap your phone. The PHONE isn’t the enemy. It’s that you’re your own enemy, and that your nervousness and awkwardness is going to try to push you into the comfort of your phone for reasons that you REALLY don’t need to be on your phone for. Embrace the awkwardness and as much as physically possible lean on your date for anything you imagine your phone can do.

        • Tlaloc_Temporal@lemmy.ca
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          11 months ago

          Oh, I don’t disagree, people opt-out of being present in favor of their phones far too often. I’m just reminding us of the context of hiding your social, financial, and often legal, sci-fi multi-tool. Reducing usage and eliminating usage can be very different things for many people.

    • radix@lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      Yeah, that’s my immediate thought as well. Attention is huge.

          • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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            11 months ago

            You pay for your meal via contactless right? So you have to get your phone out.

            No one saying they get your phone out in the meal. It’s just if you get your phone out at any point on a first date, they’ll see it right?

            • KISSmyOS@lemmy.world
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              11 months ago

              I pay with a bag full of small change I got from begging in the street, like all Android users.

            • radix@lemm.ee
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              11 months ago

              At a sit-down place, you normally give your card to the waitstaff once they bring the check/receipt. There’s no tap-to-pay terminal they bring to you.

              • smeg@feddit.uk
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                11 months ago

                You should not ever let someone take your bank card out of your sight! Where are you where this is accepted!?

                • radix@lemm.ee
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                  11 months ago

                  Yeah, it’s not great if you think about it, but it’s standard. I’m not here to be a prescriptivist; I’m just describing my experience (and it’s a common one in the US of A).

              • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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                11 months ago

                That’s not how it works everywhere in the world. Most places you just pay with your phone or your card.

                • rwhitisissle@lemmy.world
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                  11 months ago

                  My brother in Christ you sound like you’ve never been to a restaurant with waiters. And regardless you also literally just said “Most places you just pay with your phone or your card” after asking how he would pay if he couldn’t use his phone. You literally already know the answer to your own question.

            • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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              11 months ago

              I haven’t ever set up any kind of payment stuff on my phone and I’ve never had any issue paying for anything.

    • onion@feddit.de
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      11 months ago

      I’ve got some zoomer info for you: We use our phone to check the time

      • kronisk @lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Well, you could pull up your phone for a short while if you excuse yourself and preferably tell the other person what you’re doing. “Excuse me, I just have to find the tickets on my phone”. This goes for any time you’re talking to another person, btw, not just dates, otherwise you’re being disrespectful to the people around you.

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    11 months ago

    I don’t think I would want to date a woman who cares what phone I use.

    • SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I dunno, I think it would be fun to discuss parts of AOSP my date and I are both familiar with.

    • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I’d be willing to date someone with a similar amount of contempt for anything apple to what I have. I’d also be willing to date someone with an interest in the type of phone I use (like a phone enthusiast, though I don’t share that enthusiasm). If she suggests I should root my phone, she’d be a keeper.

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    11 months ago

    Alternate take: Buy an Android phone and use your green bubble to weed trash people out of your life.

  • Death_Equity@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Use your android without concern, any girl that cares about your phone that much can self-curve herself and save you problems down the road.

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    11 months ago

    Counter-suggestion (and this applies to everyone with an Android regardless of gender dating anyone else regardless of gender), do use your Android phone in front of your date because that weeds out psychos who would reject you over not owning their preferred product.

    • Facebones@reddthat.com
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      11 months ago

      I’m 36, and a disabled veteran. I put that in my tinder profile, cause I know most women are going to hate that I’m not maximizing the selling of my life to capitalism.

      I’ve had two chicks match with me just to tell me my profile is shit for including that - Whatevs if you’re gonna swerve me for chillin on a pension let’s get it out of the way instead of wasting my time until work comes up. 🤷

      • wheeldawg@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        I just now replied to another comment remaking I had never heard of “curve” being used like this. And there are already variants of it? How long has this been a thing?

        • Facebones@reddthat.com
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          11 months ago

          Idk man I’m ancient in internet years haha. As for “variants” I’d say it’s probably regional, but again hell if I know 😂

    • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Yeah, adopting behaviour to keep something like that in my life doesn’t seem like doing myself a favour.

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    11 months ago

    These men dodged a bullet.

    Better advice: use an android phone to filter out the reactive dipshits.

    • Synapse@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Back in the days, basic bitches would dump you because you didn’t drive a german car. Now they judge you on your phone. Times are hard for everyone it seems.

      • FiveMacs@lemmy.ca
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        11 months ago

        Seems like they are making it easy…show the phone instantly. When they show distaste for a brand, just leave.

  • jet@hackertalks.com
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    11 months ago

    This is a feature of android, not a bug. If someone is that shallow and can’t consider the possible motivations of using a GASP different phone, they would be a really bad partner.

    • Syndic@feddit.de
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      11 months ago

      Exactly, if someone bases their dating on such a stupid reason, imagine what other stupid things they base their life around. Thanks, I’ll pass.

    • alekwithak@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Thought you said AOSP for a hot second. Now there’s an acronym I haven’t seen in a good long time.

  • arc@lemm.ee
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    11 months ago

    If a woman is that shallow and materialistic then the guy is dodging a bullet. Anyhow, it’s a weird thing to say since “android phone” could mean literally anything from a basic $100 smartphone all the way up to a $50,000 Vertu diamond and white alligator skin. i.e. it could mean the guy is sensible with his money or even more shallow and materialistic than the girl could ever dream to be.

    • Skeezix@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Could mean that he enjoys a near complete lack of privacy, likes to use a samsung web browser, has his life assfucked by Google, likes shovelware, or wants a phone that only gets updates for 3 years. I’d be suspicious too.

      • Virtual Insanity @lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Yeah… Or it could be the complete opposite of all that.

        Android / AOSP comes in many flavours from Swiss cheese give your life away security to locked down more than any apple device could be. IOS only comes in 1 flavour.

          • Virtual Insanity @lemmy.world
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            11 months ago

            Something on par with iOS for usability and security. And as virtuous as everyone claims iOS and Apple are for security they really aren’t that great. It’s clear you’ve drunk the koolaid so I won’t waste my time further.

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          11 months ago

          Lineage is not about providing a google free version of Android. It does not contain google apps, for licensing reasons, probably also to let the user choose. But it does not go further, all the other stuff like captive portal check, agps, dns etc still uses google servers. It’s not “degoogled” in any way. Love lineage btw but we need to be aware of what it is and isn’t.

          • SomeSphinx@lemmy.world
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            11 months ago

            Would graphene OS be the answer here then? I’ve been looking around for my new phone lately as I’m trying to do the same. Would it be possible to de-google lineage OS manually or is it just better to pick another OS? Sorry for the questions but I don’t really know where the FOSS android communities are yet so I don’t know where to look for the answers.

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        11 months ago

        I just want to be able to access files on my media server without having to pay 10$ for an app.

      • force@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        LMAO iPhones have those problems but like 10x as much, just replace Google&Samsung with Apple. Imagine not being able to download or use anything that isn’t approved by big daddy Apple.

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    11 months ago

    I feel like using it on the first date is actually better, as a form of litmus test to find out of your date is trash (bad).

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    11 months ago

    Does this really matter that much in the US?. Here in the Netherlands about 70% of people had an android phone in 2022. Nobody really cares what you use, as long as you’re happy using it.

        • Mr_Blott@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          It was only six months ago that I learnt they were getting their knickers in a twist for years about the colour of text messages

          I had absolutely no fucking clue that text messages had different colours

          How. Fuckin. Infantile is that?!?

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            11 months ago

            If you think it’s the color of the bubble that is the problem, you might be the infant

            • Mr_Blott@lemmy.world
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              11 months ago

              I’m not the one paying a grand for a phone that doesn’t support basic SMS functions and reduces the quality of MMS for goodness knows what reason but probably money

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                11 months ago

                They may soon be forced to support RSC which will be funny. Especially if they then decide only to support it in Europe.

            • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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              11 months ago

              No that is the reason. There is nothing intellectual about the position. It’s just moronic.

              • 4am@lemm.ee
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                11 months ago

                Yeah, no one claimed it was intellectual, stop putting words in my mouth.

                All grandma knows is when we add cousin Linus all the bubbles turn green and the photos look terrible, so she leaves him out and only emails him later if she remembers.

                Also, yeah that’s Apple’s fault. Never said it wasn’t.

                But to imply that there is, like, bubble racism or something going on, ie it’s purely over aesthetics, and that people are being “infantile” because of it, is ignorant reductance of such magnitude that you basically burned your own strawman down.

              • Ilikecheese@lemm.ee
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                11 months ago

                Except it’s not the color, it’s the feature set that the colors represent.

                • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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                  11 months ago

                  You don’t know what you’re talking about then, since Android has exactly the same feature set as iOS (I mean why wouldn’t it) it’s just that Apple refuses to use a universal standard that’s compatible and as per usual insists on using their own made-up proprietary nonsense, see charging cables, iTunes, the Apple watch, and air tags. So Android phones have to default to SMS to send any messages to iPhones. Between android devices the feature sets are there.

                  It’s called RCS, look it up it’s interesting.

                • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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                  11 months ago

                  Which is exactly one of the reasons I hate Apple. That feature set mismatch isn’t done because Android developers can’t figure out how to implement those features. It’s because Apple is locking out anyone else from using them to encourage this shit so they sell more iPhones. Your choice is as much the reason your chats don’t have those features as any Android owner’s choice is.

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        11 months ago

        I remember when the iphone first came out. A guy in my country flew to the US to buy one then came back to brag that he’s the first one in the country to have one and he couldn’t even use it here.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        I hope you would not avoid me for having an iPhone any more than I would avoid you for having an Android phone because judging people for what phone or computer or OS they use is stupid. In my case, I have an iPhone because I got in very early and now have several hundred dollars’ worth of apps I don’t want to pay for again. Maybe one day I will decide it is worth that sacrifice, but right now, I don’t feel like it is. I also don’t get the latest and best iPhone. I replaced my XR with a 13 this year.

        But to me, you are no better than the hypothetical date in this post who judges the person for not having an iPhone. Why do either of you give a shit? It’s a personal choice and it doesn’t matter any more than what color your house is painted or what percent of fat you like in your milk.

        Judge people for their attitudes and their actions, not what personal devices they decide to spend their money on.

    • st3ph3n@kbin.social
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      11 months ago

      iPhone is dominant in the US, but I can’t believe people give enough of a shit about which smartphone someone uses for it to be a dealbreaker in finding a significant other.

      • oolio@feddit.de
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        11 months ago

        Oh they definitely do, especially among young people. They even get bullied over the color of the iMessage text bubble which shows up in different color if the message was sent from a phone other than iPhone.

      • Asafum@feddit.nl
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        11 months ago

        I blame dating sites to be honest.

        For a large portion of women they can have almost anyone at the push of a button and so they start rejecting people for the most absurd things.

        I imagine the same could be said for the “chads” on dating sites, but I think they care more about the pump and dump than being superficial about anything because they aren’t in it for a relationship.

        Then there is me, a literal joke of a human. My phone would probably be the last thing I’d get rejected for as you won’t even get that far before swiping “not ever.” Lol

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      11 months ago

      I’m a Finn, not sure what the apple % is here, but I’ve never met anyone who isn’t either a child or atleast slightly retarded that owns one.