Last time, I used: “Anybody need anything while I’m out?” and that went over well. May not make it through this surgery on Friday, so I turn to Lemmy for top-notch suggestions for my potential last words!
It’s pretty clear to me many people here have never either had general anesthesia or talked to anyone who had, you can’t really time funny one-liners right before you pass out.
Here’s how it works:
They’ll put a mask with a rubber tube in your mouth for oxygen, and tell you to relax and count back from 10, so you start counting impatiently(it’s boring, and there is nothing else to do), wondering when the surgery is going to start.
Ten.
Nine.
Eight.
Now the anesthesiologist is in front of you, checking on you to see if you’re OK. “But I haven’t finish counting down yet, when is the surgery going to start?” You ask them.
“It’s already over”, they explain.
Then you realize you are in a completely different room, the tube is no longer in your mouth, but you feel so weak you can hardly move, and the stitches/staples around your new surgery wound is starting to itch.
It’s like a segment of your life was cut out and erased into nothingness.
I’ve never been put under, but I just assumed OP meant that they would say something right before they started counting, not after.
Proper explanation, indeed - you never get all the way through the countdown before you time travel. Beforehand, though (at least in my too many to count without it sounding like a weird brag experiences), the “last words” moment is before the mask, but after the pre-anesthesia. Depends on the procedure, and probably the person, too.
I’ve had nearly a dozen surgeries, and none of them have gone like that.
Sometimes I have a mask over my face, but mostly I don’t, then they give me a little prick in my arm. I feel cold travel up my arm, whilst the person counts down from 10. When the cold gets to my shoulder, which is usually when the countdown is at about 7 or so, I go under, like someone turned off a light, but just slow enough that I can just remember an awareness of being about to go under. There’s no weakness, no feeling of being unable to move, just cold travelling up my arm, and then lights out.
Then, I wake up, with an awareness that time has passed, though not an awareness of how long it has been.
Neat, that’s legitimately interesting! Maybe you have something unique in your physiology that gives you a different perspective? I’m pushing 6 surgeries under general, and around 5 precedures under IV, probably missing some numbers with my now shoddy memory forming capabilities, but my experiences with the knockout sedation could be described much more similarly to your experience, and a few of the IV sedations weren’t as deep, so I remember a bit more of the “in and out”, but mostly it’s just “Oh, yeah, I feel there’s a change in my coherence-BLACKOUT”, and then next awareness is recovery room beeps.
It’s interesting how different people respond. I remember changing into the tunic/robe, and then nothing. I don’t even remember leaving the pre-op room, just waking up in the post-op hallway in one of about 20 beds.
Some of mine were like that
This matches my experience too. Waking up felt like coming out of a deep sleep. I knew time had passed
This is also exactly how I remember my only time under the knife. I remember feeling that cold in my veins and “this is it, I’m passing out any moment now”. Then I don’t remember anything until I was in the recovery section even though I regained conscience in the operating block as expected. I just remember waking up with the oxygen mask covering my mouth and feeling extremely claustrophobic.
The last 2 times I went under (for a complicated tooth extraction and the subsequent implant) they didn’t do the countdown, which surprised me because that was what I remembered most clearly from my lung surgery as a teen. They just asked me if I was comfortable, then said “Good, cause you’re about to get extra comfortable!” and we laughed, then I woke up. Maybe it was a dental surgeon thing? But I’ve also got a really good relationship with the dental techs and the anesthesiologist was a riot.
I’ve had many surgeries and most were exactly like this. One time, though, I remember counting down too 4 and then saying, “My ears are ringing.” The anesthesiologist said, “Is this better?” I said, “Yes,” and then woke up.
Hold your breath before the mask goes on then really quickly say “tennineeightsevensixfivefourthreetwoone”
Breath in, and then go “bet you I’m the first to…”
Pass out
I may be wrong, but I think the mask is just oxygen. What puts you under is the stuff they inject you.
In that case the, one liner has to be long and designed in such a way that every word can work as a cliffhanger.
Before I fall a sleep, I should tell you about the secret gold treasure buried under the old…
I could feel that I was going out as I counted. It felt as if I slowly lifted an inch above the operating table and rested on a fluffy white cloud. I could feel them inserting catheter and needles but it didn’t hurt even a bit, if anything it tickled. Last sight was the grumpy face of this fridge-sized bald anesthesiologist.
Woke up a second later in Intensive Care unit, surprisingly well rested.
By the way, there was no tube in my mouth. They just put a mask on and it smelled sweet.
I had no mask for my surgery. Maybe because it was removing wisdom teeth.
My surgery was then starting liquid in my arm. I’m wheeled to the surgery room where three nurses are setting things up.
They see I’m nervous. “Don’t worry! Doctor X is very good,” she pauses. “We do call him the velociraptor though.”
“Why?”
“Because he has short arms!”
“That’s mean!” I say.
They laugh. “You won’t remember, it’s fine.”
“I’ll remember!” I try and say, but my mouth is full of gauze and I’m in a very different room.
No sense of passage of time. In surgery, then in recovery. Hated that.
But you did remember tho
Same case here with wisdom tooth removal but I do vaguely remember my entire body becoming numb before it stopped being numb instantly and the surgery was over
Depending on how consciousness actually works, the you before that might have died and you’re an entirely new consciousness with the same brain and memories.
Ah, the Star Trek transporter conundrum.
I was thinking more “ship of Theseus”… what is “you”?
I’ve thought about death and what it means a lot in recent months.
As we go to sleep every night, how do we know the you who wakes up the next morning is still you?
While sleeping brain activity retains a natural patern and flow, no point in worrying about that since sleep is absolutely a necessity (and I love it). Anesthesia disrupts this brain activity and interrupts your mental existence.
Not my experience, I was put to sleep through IV and I knew when I was falling asleep. I then had a weird dream mixed with reality, and when I woke up all the text was upside down for a minute.
ʍʇɟ
Same, every time I’ve had a general aesthetic the anaesthesiologist has sat down near my arm, asked if I’m ready, and when I say “yup” he says some medical jargon to the anesthetist/resp nurse, then warns me that it’s going to feel cold and taste funny, he connects a bolus syringe to my IV bung and as he’s pushing tells me to count down from ten, and the anesthetist grabs my head gently as the anaesthesiologist moves around towards my head and presumably grabs some other instruments ready to intubate.
My record is 7. But next time I’m going to try counting faster - not sure why but I’d always try to time it to actual seconds.
For GA, I’ve never been given a gas mask while awake, maybe it’s to do with “rapid induction”, I’m not 100% sure what that is, only that every anaesthesiologist I’ve had has said he’s going to “rapidly induce” because my connective tissue disorder indicates the need to. I never really questioned it.
The only time I’ve been given a mask while being told to count was when I was going under twilight sedation for a colonoscopy. as they were administering the IV, they also gave me a mask that was unexpectedly strawberry “flavoured” and I had a panic attack as I was going under because my grandma is allergic to strawberries, I’m not, but in my semi lucid state I forgot I wasn’t and started mumbling about being allergic to air.
(I’ve only ever had male anaesthesiologists, so apppogies for only using male pronouns to describe the doctor)
This. Exactly how I ended up married!
(Come to think of it, the honeymoon ran like that, too.) /s
On your mouth, not in it. No tube in the mouth.
It’s not standard for all anesthesia but patients can be intubated.
I know, but as you say, it’s not standard.
Just the tip.
Please and thank you.
That’s not how it worked for me either of the two times. I don’t have any memories of going out the first time and I think I kinda woke up kinda normally both times.
That’s about how it worked for me on the second surgery. Apparently my first words coming to were “holy fuck I need a cigarette”
I was just put under a couple of weeks ago and they didn’t ask me to count down. And it also took longer than that.
oof, yup, that sounds familiar XD
I had a very stodgy surgeon and I actually got a laugh out of him. He checked in with me pre surgery and as he was leaving said he would see me in the OR and I was like I hope I don’t see you (meaning I hoped the anesthesia worked). No one else got what I meant except for him and he had a genuine chuckle.
This gives me a sense of satisfaction by proxy.
I said “Yeah. You’ll see me.”
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I admit. I just pictured them lying on the operating table about to be knocked out for surgery with them saying “Good luck on the surgery” to the surgeons.
But seriously! Best of luck op!
I can’t decide whether it’s appropriate to say good luck & God speed.
True story: The morning before going in for foot surgery, my mom was in a silly mood and wrote “wrong foot” on the other non-surgery-scheduled foot with a marker before putting on her socks.
After the surgery everything was fine, and later when checking up on her the surgeon told her everyone in the operating room got a good laugh out of that “wrong foot” message.
Mom was glad her joke worked out, but later started wondering why they were looking at the wrong foot in the first place and now wonders if her private joke to amuse herself actually saved her from having the wrong foot operated upon.
Probably so they could keep an eye on the toenails on the non-operating foot.
There’s a reason they tell you not to wear nail polish before surgery. The nailbeds are one of the best ways to detect cyanosis caused by low oxygen levels in blood.
I’d imagine a “control foot” is probably preferential, and it’s easier to keep an eye on the other foot during surgery than it is to keep an eye on their fingernails.
Meanwhile I got leg amputations where the patient paints their nails before the leg is looped off lol
Medical staff actually DO sometimes write on the appendage that they are supposed to operate on as one of their checks.
Yeah, in my hospital pre-op, we physically hand a marker to the patient and tell them to mark where the surgery will be.
Does that mean I can just mark myself anywhere and you’ll operate on it?
Think of all the possibilities!
The patient has to get exposed and positioned, then padded (so there are no pressure injuries, no errant cables or equipment pushing on skin, etc). Also under anesthesia (depending on the type but I’ll assume general/completely asleep) you aren’t moving and your body may get moved or shifted into an unnatural position.
It’s also nice to have controls as mentioned by another reply, but pulse oximetry is great, and can be slapped on any non sterilized area to assess oxygenation.
I had surgery three weeks back. The mood in the OR was good. As they were strapping me to the table for bone surgery on my femur, ( They were going to have to exert force, and I needed to be on my side), I asked them if tbay had all watched the youtube tutorials. Laughs ensued.
*Laughs and slight sideways glances at eachother
Ftfy
Some of them forgot to watch the youtube tutorials
Stealing this for my next colonoscopy.
“I’m an influencer, can I stream this on Twitch?”
“Anyone need anything while I’m out” ha! That’s brilliant. I gotta remember that if I ever need it.
“How do you keep a surgical staff in suspense?”
a surgical staff
That is not a group of medical professionals, that is a wizard’s stick with amputation powers!
I had to be in twilight, that’s where you’re basicilly out but can just barely understand what’s going on a bit. I was in and out and just absolutely baked. At one point I looked at the anesthesiologist and asked for a little more. He got concerned and asked if I could feel anything? I said “no, no I can’t. I’m just having a really good time”. I’m not sure because he was wearing a mask and all, but I think he grinned and I have zero memory from then.
You can do what my 4yo did before his last surgery: shout out “WAIT WAIT WAIT!” right before they put on your mask or give you the drip, then hold out your fist and say, “FIST BUMP!”
“I’m aware that consciousness still exists under general anesthesia, but the brain is no longer capable of forming memories, so have fun stabbing me with knives, I’m actually going to feel it!”
I broke my ankle a few years back and the bones had to be surgically reattached, but the OR was full so they had to set and splint it in the meantime. The shot of fentanyl didn’t do anything, so they gave a cocktail that knocked me right the fuck out and set my ankle. My husband said I shot straight up like I was in the Exorcist, yelled and swore a bunch and passed out again. I remember nothing, thankfully.
I’ve had that. They said I’d be awake but won’t remember anything. I’d feel it but won’t care.
Sure enough, I’m sitting up in bed, doctors are gone, and my leg is set, I feel totally normal. I had no idea what happened except that they said that’d happen. It was the weirdest experience. I hadn’t even changed positions. Like 15 minutes just got stolen from me.
I didn’t wake until the next day, they doped me right up or the fentanyl had a delayed reaction cause I slept for a good 15 hours after I was knocked out.
Ah. Mine was to set while waiting for surgery so things didn’t tighten up and be harder in the OR. I had tibia and fibula snapped and dislocated ankle. They got the joint back in place and straightened the leg, then put it in a splint to wait in.
They practiced the movements while I was with it and it seemed very violent and physical. Then they dosed me to do the real thing and the next thing I remember was sitting there wondering wtf just happened.
Yep same, I just slept a lot longer, probably cause of the cocktail they had to give me. And waiting for the OR took a little over a day so I was grateful to be out of it the whole time.
But hang on, there’s an interesting topic. Is consciousness the current processing, or is it the memory (and perhaps something additional)? Since not all nerve signals arrive in the brain at the same time, consciousness provably isn’t immediate. Perhaps it’s the recent memory of what just happened?
Fuck dude… You just told everyone that we’re living in a constant state of desync and the gamer in me doesn’t know how to handle that
Eh…life is an MMRPG, so a bit of lag is normal…
What about now?
The real lag was inside us the whole time
Lol, wait till you see the specs
Separately, is it still pain if you’re not conscious of it?
Doctors used to assert that babies didn’t feel pain, because 1) they couldn’t tell us about it, and 2) they didn’t remember it later. They would just not anesthetize babies. Of course, that endpoint of this line of reasoning is horrifying, but it’s still a fair question. When we say “pain” do we mean the firing of the nerves, or do we mean awareness of it?
When we say “pain” do we mean the firing of the nerves, or do we mean awareness of it?
I’d say awareness of it, especially considering AFAIK local anesthesia (as in, fully awake during) doesn’t stop the nerves from firing, just from the signals getting to the brain, and I’d say that’s blocking the pain.^
Also there’s an interesting point in there: (this is not a rebuttal, just an addition)
Doctors used to assert that babies didn’t feel pain, because 1) they couldn’t tell us about it, and 2) they didn’t remember it later.
The reason doctors nowadays use anesthesia, (besides it being squick-y not to) is because it was discovered that, (though they may not consciously remember it) it can manifest in PTSD and other trauma related disorders later in life.^
In addition, it was found that there is a heightened level of stress hormones during surgery on infants, which were absent in surgery done with anesthesia.^ (These stress hormones also increased the risk in post-operational complications, due to the hormones acting to break down carbohydrates and other fats in the infant’s bodies)
I’ve had a lot of different injuries. On heavy morphine and pethadine, you definitely feel pain just as bad but you don’t care and just kind of forget about it. It’s like it dulls the nervous system in a way that it’s not blocking signals, it’s blocking how your system reacts to them. It’s hard to explain, but it’s a pretty surreal experience. You should be stressing, but you’re not. You’re very aware of the severity of the injury, but you’re totally calm about it and it slips your mind, like pain is the lowest concern.
I’m usually thinking like, “I wonder how the fix will go? What if I need to pee? I hope recovery isn’t months… Oh, yeah, and my limb is on fire with a bone sticking out, but they’re on it. I hope there’s no snorers in my ward and the food’s good. It’d be nice if they operate this evening because this sucks. I hope I can self-medicate morphine for sleep tonight. That really helped last time. I feel fucking great and am dribbling. Oh, yeah, and my limb is on fire with a bone sticking out. Meh…”
Thank you for sharing your experience!
“carbohydrates and other fats”? Did I not pay attention about carbohydrates in school?
To be fair, dosing babies with anesthesia is way more difficult, and there’s zero record of whether they have any drug allergies or intolerances
and there’s zero record of whether they have any drug allergies or intolerances
Nowadays, you can test for anesthetic drug resistances with DNA site testing, (as in, a blood test), though of course, this does not mean that it is always used, for various reasons.
A personal anecdote:
I’ve had one done after I had bad side-effects to ADHD medication I had tried, and I haven’t had any bad effects in the medications I’ve tried since. (besides drowsiness)
Edit: I want to say, I’m not saying that getting the dosage right is not incredibly difficult, I just wanted to mention that we can detect drug allergies without putting them under, (so to speak).
That’s good to know! I just swelled up for a week because my new dentist used a different kind of local anesthetic, so it was close to the front of my mind. That would have helped a lot
Note that you’re getting into something that was a big deal in the 70s and 80s. They’d perform any surgery on babies without anesthetic (which is dangerous to babies) because it was believed that they wouldn’t remember anyway so it wasn’t a big deal after all. I suspect that people will learn about this with horror.
To the best of my understanding this is why local and general anesthesia can be the best combo.
General keeps you from being conscious of the damage of the knives during the surgical procedure. Local numbs the area to keep the brain from being aware that damage is happening. Reducing trauma sounds like a good idea to me.
Pain is fascinating (particularly if you’re not the one experiencing it.) Two people experiencing the exact same nerve stimulation can be painful to one but not the other. Context, life history and experience, and expectations all play into the experience of pain. In general, your brain determines if something is painful, then you do or don’t experience that pain. People can be shot or stabbed and be completely unaware until the brain decides it’s time to let them know.
Yes, pain is pain. People can still feel it and suffer even if they do not remember it. Anesthesia in context of surgery is too complex of a topic for me to comment on but I do frequently manage patients that are sedated, on ventilators either going to or coming from surgery. There are different scales and tools we use to assess if someone is under sedated or in pain. Keeping explanations simple pain can reflect as changes in vital signs, rigid or tense muscles, facial expressions. Sedation in the context I’m referring to is more a scale of either how awake someone is or what type of stimulation they respond to, for example do they open their eyes if someone says their name? Or do they open their eyes if I gently tap on their shoulder or do I need to put pressure on their nail bed for them to respond, if they respond at all. If they’re sedated enough they won’t remember the pain but they would still feel pain. Again this is NOT referring to general anesthesia during surgery, that is too complex and anesthesiologist have a very difficult job ensuring people are adequately medicated for surgery while also ensuring that they treat the side effects of the anesthesia medications so they don’t just kill people.
The two do have some overlap and my previous statement assumes no chemical paralysis. There are also times where it is acceptable to just sedate someone, or do something emergent without sedation and then giving something like Versed which causes retrograde amnesia. The person may have been fully conscious and felt everything that just happened but still won’t remember it.
This is a bit of an oversimplification but I’d say firing of the nerves is pain. I don’t have literature available to support but I know giving babies anesthesia is very dangerous so I would like to believe that the reasons you listed where just an over simplified “it’s really okay to do X or Y because they won’t remember it” rather than explaining to a parent in a way that they would truly understand the risk of anesthesia for a baby AND still allow whatever procedure to be done or force a parent to knowingly elect to put their baby through pain and suffering for a procedure. But again, not a doctor and I don’t work with people/babies during surgery
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It’s not just the brain. From what I understand, muscles and what-not would still react to stimuli and damage if not for anesthesia.
I went with the Leslie Nielsen quote from the movie Airplane, “I just wanted to say good luck, we’re all counting on you.”
Bonus points if you say it when entering the operating room, when given the anesthesia and a third time during the surgery itself
Actually when I made the joke, I got zero laughs in the operating room. I had to explain the joke, and still got no real comment/laugh.
I finally followed it up with a Rodney Dangerfield version of “Tough room” and that got a chuckle finally.
Just randomly wake up during your surgery and say it, and then promptly go back to sleep.
OP – can you please come back after the surgery and let us know that you’re okay?
Yeah, as funny as this is, it would be even funnier if you got back
“Good luck, we’re all counting on you”
Then say it again when you wake up
The one and only time I was put under I said “you know what you’re doing, eh?” And he just put me out. I didn’t mean to say that, I was just nervous. I did see a nurse laugh though so that’s nice.
Brilliant. Part of my procedure is being performed robotically, so I may have to ask that of the robot…
May your surgery be bug free
Make sure automatic updates are turned off
“Wow am I glad that robot doesn’t look like Arnold!”
Followed by, ’ Have you checked to make sure that machine isn’t a T-1000?’
Oh in that case you could ask if it’s running on Windows, cos you don’t want any forced updates halfway through…
(I know this is probably impossible, but it would be so funny)
Tell a knock knock joke, but only the first part. Don’t reveal the punchline, just pass out. So they work extra hard to keep you alive, because only then will they hear the punchline.
They won’t either way. You’ll wake up in a hospital room terribly confused and barely able to move. Most of the operating staff will not see you then.
It will eat them FOREVER
The first words are likely “thirsty”.
I endorse this one.
