Gross to me that multiple comments here are ignoring this reality. Crimes committed by men against women in situations like that are so common that women aren’t protecting themselves unless they consider every unfamiliar man a potential threat.
Obviously women can also commit crimes against men, but its so much less common that I don’t have to take precautions to protect myself against them.
As a man it kind of sucks when you are assumed to be dangerous even when you aren’t, but you need to get over it. Its not worth it for women to compromise their safety, and assume you to not be a threat just to make you feel better.
Is it really common though? Looking at the generalized US stats its seems that 95%+ of women murdered are by a person they know. Where as for men that stat is 78%. Its pretty rare to get murdered let alone murdered outside on the street. Most* people fear strangers because of news events not because of likelihood.
Hard to say. I see women out walking alone at night all the time in my city, at least a handful just past my house every evening. (It’s a university town.) I passed one woman happily chatting on her phone, and oblivious to the world, while riding home tonight after dark. The last time anyone was attacked by a stranger was, I dunno? It definitely happens, but it’s years between instances. They’d probably be safer in the late night hours, with hardly any car traffic. A lot more people get killed by cars.
Crimes committed by random strangers against women are practically non-existent. Women absolutely need to fear their creepy neighbors or angry ex, as people they know are the actual risks.
Obviously women can also commit crimes against men, but its so much less common that I don’t have to take precautions to protect myself against them.
Yeah, I’ve never had second-thoughts about walking past some dangerous-looking women or checking over my shoulder to make sure some woman isn’t following me home. This is a regular thing that women deal with, and pretending that the experiences are anywhere close to equivalent is odd.
I keep an eye on everyone, even a woman with a kid in a pram (assuming the pram isn’t just an empty decoy) could try to mug you, people get desperate and chavs get violent. Always keep your head on a swivel, don’t trust anyone at face value just because of their gender or what they look like.
I live near one of those areas. And while I’m weary of some shady women, it’s quite a common trend that women get creative and men get brutish.
I’m more worried that the woman may pickpocket or deceive me first way, way before she pulls a weapon out on me.
It’s not enough to point at a dangerous place and be like “see how bad people are?” but you also need to be be granular and observe the trends in behavior.
That said, I have been warned of a gang of three men and one woman who have been accused of mugging folks in the neighborhood. But even that is rare to hear. Will it ever be three women and one man?
People are afraid of anything in these situations, but they justify it by using men as an excuse, even though, you wouldn’t tell it’s man or women, until it’s too late anyways….
It is not an “excuse.” If I’m attacked by a man at night, I will have a more difficult time protecting myself than if a man was attacked at night, on average. Not to mention that you have to ask yourself, what is the attacker after? Because being sexually assaulted or raped is so personal and awful that it’s natural to have a higher amount of fear of that outcome.
Like how if you were equally likely of being jumped at night by a stranger as you were of being abducted and having spiky metal spears shoved in your urethra… you might recognize that’s it’s not super likely you’ll get jumped, but you would be way less likely to risk it since the fact that sounding is just too awful to chance (for the vast majority of the population).
Also… my sample size is too small to be statistically relevant, but 100% of the men I know are sure they could “take” a random female attacker.
Unrelated; asking that question was difficult but not for the reason I expected. It was like a game! “Do I have super powers in this scenario?” “Is she armed? Am I armed?” “How much time do I have to prepare?” And my personal favorite, from a particularly well-traveled friend- “Is she like a random person, or one of my exes?”
Edit: The last guy has crunched the numbers and decided he could take all of his exes, unless they team up, which he thinks is unlikely, so I’m continuing to count that toward the 100%.
100% of the men I know are sure they could “take” a random female attacker.
Until she’s your roommate’s girlfriend, he’s out of town, she comes into your room when you get home at 4am off a 12hr shift dishwashing when all you want in the world is food, to pet your cats, and to sleep until 2057, and forces herself on you complete with grabbing your wrists and the phrase “no you don’t understand, this is going to happen,” and then you realize that while yeah you probably could use physical violence to stop her even though she’s actually bigger than you, legally even, who are the police going to believe? You, or the crying woman who knows she can weaponize the entire justice system which doesn’t even consider it rape for her to do that (it’s legally defined as “sexual assault” at worst since “rape requires penetration” so woman can’t be charged with rape in my area)? I guess this is happening and I’m going to feel guilty about it for years even though I shouldn’t, fucking cool.
Violence and rape is more likely to come from someone you know than randos on the street, and ime while women who wish to victimize people don’t have the upper hand in physical stature, the ones so inclined know how to weaponize the justice system effectively enough to get what they want.
And btw if a woman is randomly attacking people on the street meth is usually involved, they shouldn’t be so confident.
Haha… You may be right about how often it happens, but no woman is going to feel safe because it rarely happens. Women can get kidnapped or beaten up or raped too… It’s not a safe world.
It’s not a safe world for guys either but at least we are built to take a few punches without breaking an arm.
Gross to me that multiple comments here are ignoring this reality. Crimes committed by men against women in situations like that are so common that women aren’t protecting themselves unless they consider every unfamiliar man a potential threat.
Obviously women can also commit crimes against men, but its so much less common that I don’t have to take precautions to protect myself against them.
As a man it kind of sucks when you are assumed to be dangerous even when you aren’t, but you need to get over it. Its not worth it for women to compromise their safety, and assume you to not be a threat just to make you feel better.
Is it really common though? Looking at the generalized US stats its seems that 95%+ of women murdered are by a person they know. Where as for men that stat is 78%. Its pretty rare to get murdered let alone murdered outside on the street. Most* people fear strangers because of news events not because of likelihood.
Random murders just aren’t common and random women murders are even less common. Even rape and sexual assault the stats of random attacks on the street are very low. https://cde.ucr.cjis.gov/LATEST/webapp/#/pages/explorer/crime/crime-trend
This is for the US, I’d expect it to be far lower for most other countries.
I just want to know how these figures would change in case women were to change their behavior and start going out for late night walks.
I think part of the reason we see these numbers instead is due to women’s apprehensivess in the first place, but I could be wrong.
Hard to say. I see women out walking alone at night all the time in my city, at least a handful just past my house every evening. (It’s a university town.) I passed one woman happily chatting on her phone, and oblivious to the world, while riding home tonight after dark. The last time anyone was attacked by a stranger was, I dunno? It definitely happens, but it’s years between instances. They’d probably be safer in the late night hours, with hardly any car traffic. A lot more people get killed by cars.
Crimes committed by random strangers against women are practically non-existent. Women absolutely need to fear their creepy neighbors or angry ex, as people they know are the actual risks.
Yeah, I’ve never had second-thoughts about walking past some dangerous-looking women or checking over my shoulder to make sure some woman isn’t following me home. This is a regular thing that women deal with, and pretending that the experiences are anywhere close to equivalent is odd.
You don’t live in a very dangerous area, then.
I keep an eye on everyone, even a woman with a kid in a pram (assuming the pram isn’t just an empty decoy) could try to mug you, people get desperate and chavs get violent. Always keep your head on a swivel, don’t trust anyone at face value just because of their gender or what they look like.
I live near one of those areas. And while I’m weary of some shady women, it’s quite a common trend that women get creative and men get brutish.
I’m more worried that the woman may pickpocket or deceive me first way, way before she pulls a weapon out on me.
It’s not enough to point at a dangerous place and be like “see how bad people are?” but you also need to be be granular and observe the trends in behavior.
That said, I have been warned of a gang of three men and one woman who have been accused of mugging folks in the neighborhood. But even that is rare to hear. Will it ever be three women and one man?
Edit to fix autocorrect.
It’s dark and night, how can you tell gender?
People are afraid of anything in these situations, but they justify it by using men as an excuse, even though, you wouldn’t tell it’s man or women, until it’s too late anyways….
Well general body shape and height are pretty easy tells.
It is not an “excuse.” If I’m attacked by a man at night, I will have a more difficult time protecting myself than if a man was attacked at night, on average. Not to mention that you have to ask yourself, what is the attacker after? Because being sexually assaulted or raped is so personal and awful that it’s natural to have a higher amount of fear of that outcome.
Like how if you were equally likely of being jumped at night by a stranger as you were of being abducted and having spiky metal spears shoved in your urethra… you might recognize that’s it’s not super likely you’ll get jumped, but you would be way less likely to risk it since the fact that sounding is just too awful to chance (for the vast majority of the population).
Also… my sample size is too small to be statistically relevant, but 100% of the men I know are sure they could “take” a random female attacker.
Unrelated; asking that question was difficult but not for the reason I expected. It was like a game! “Do I have super powers in this scenario?” “Is she armed? Am I armed?” “How much time do I have to prepare?” And my personal favorite, from a particularly well-traveled friend- “Is she like a random person, or one of my exes?”
Edit: The last guy has crunched the numbers and decided he could take all of his exes, unless they team up, which he thinks is unlikely, so I’m continuing to count that toward the 100%.
Until she’s your roommate’s girlfriend, he’s out of town, she comes into your room when you get home at 4am off a 12hr shift dishwashing when all you want in the world is food, to pet your cats, and to sleep until 2057, and forces herself on you complete with grabbing your wrists and the phrase “no you don’t understand, this is going to happen,” and then you realize that while yeah you probably could use physical violence to stop her even though she’s actually bigger than you, legally even, who are the police going to believe? You, or the crying woman who knows she can weaponize the entire justice system which doesn’t even consider it rape for her to do that (it’s legally defined as “sexual assault” at worst since “rape requires penetration” so woman can’t be charged with rape in my area)? I guess this is happening and I’m going to feel guilty about it for years even though I shouldn’t, fucking cool.
Violence and rape is more likely to come from someone you know than randos on the street, and ime while women who wish to victimize people don’t have the upper hand in physical stature, the ones so inclined know how to weaponize the justice system effectively enough to get what they want.
And btw if a woman is randomly attacking people on the street meth is usually involved, they shouldn’t be so confident.
I can easily see if it’s a women or a man just based on how they move from a distance.
I guess it depends on how dark it is. If it’s pitch black, nobody can see, but usually you have some shape you can see.
you dont need my validation but here it is anyway, thanks for being cool and normal about things so serious as this :)
Sorry I didn’t assume you were a pussy. My mistake.
Women are murdered less often than men. It’s simply irrational for women to be more afraid of being murdered than men are.
Haha… You may be right about how often it happens, but no woman is going to feel safe because it rarely happens. Women can get kidnapped or beaten up or raped too… It’s not a safe world.
It’s not a safe world for guys either but at least we are built to take a few punches without breaking an arm.
Nothing is rare if it happens to you.
Truth.