I’d like to do a series on 56 different emotions which we’ll eventually get through as time permits.
Anger
Anger is an intense emotion defined as a perceived provocation, the invasion of one’s boundaries, or a threat. From an evolutionary standpoint, anger serves to mobilize psychological resources in order to address the threat/invasion. Anger is directed at an individual of equal status.
Try to keep it fresh by what is current but its also cool to retrospect
I get angry when folks cut in line, or otherwise broadcast that they think that everyone around them is basically a piece of human garbage whose time is worth way less then theirs. Well, you don’t know me or my life, rude stranger.
They might think that everyone is worthless, but it’s common courtesy to give random strangers the benefit of the doubt until they prove to you that they do not deserve that courtesy. It seems like such a low bar to me for living comfortably in a society, so if my fellow humans can’t even muster that, that hits me in the feels :-). Oh well, sucks to be them!
Car-centric urban design.
Having people use me for their own self satisfaction
Finding out a “friend” is trying to hit on someone I liked after expressly telling them to stay in their lane, as they were very loose in their commitment to a relationship.
Attempting to have a relationship born on open and honest communication, to which it gets misinterpreted which leads to a situation where I would have been more forgiving if they told me about it before deciding to do something rather than tell me the next day about it.
Having one’s decision to accept something, feel bad about it and then come back to that the person and in accepting them again have them brag about something, double back on it and then try to make their own terms to try, with a time limit, to smooth over the offense - basically being tone-deaf to how I was feeling
Being promised something repeatedly, put up with a lot of non-sense, then with the promise in sight, asked not to participate as I watch the dream die in front of me
Being told I do not qualify for a bonus because I was “legally” employeed a month too late and only qualify at year 3
Having someone drag me into a social situation (a group chat room), then then proudly brag about something good they did with someone who I abhor
Working my ass off and my fellow employee taking it easy ( like sitting in the lunch room easy)
Repeatedly reporting a problem and because of the problem having a knock on effect on work efficiency, leads to another problem, that then the managerment is eager to gaslight how it can be a problem. A problem mind you, that the regional manager asked why their aren’t enough people and that I should insist when I am alone - which the manager would never want to have it reported or bother to properly resolve.
Going into an interview with one of the interviewees showing an attitude of such disinterest that I feel it would have been better to walk out as they clearly show no interest
Having to deal with someone dumping me for an ex( maybe not dump so much as having fallen for someone and then being thrown away after I could not serve a purpose), the moment I mentioned I felt a bit jealous, to then realise that I was only an attempt to get back at the ex for what they did(infidelity), which I did not take well made worse by working in the same place and having said person rub it in my face,essentially, how they are going back out
This then got worse when she showed a bunch of people where I lived which made me, I guess, put me in a dangerous mindset as I felt my actions were putting my family at risk and the “monkey brain” response was wanting to remove that risk. That got directed towards writing an inflammatory letter to her, which the little bitch of a boyfriend came with 2 of his friends to threaten me at work. He threatened violence after work, I got excited, followed by a self realisation of what the hell and proceeded to have a panic attack as tried to come to terms how excited I was getting at the thought of wanting to go out in a blaze of anger and glory.
People telling me they understand, when their actions repeatedly and clearly show me that they, in fact, do not understand
Asking someone to politely, at first, not doing something - like leave crumbs in the margarine (vegetable butter) or margarine in the jam, have it ignored and continue to do it
Using a electric kettle and only pouring enough water for themselves, as the water quality leaves residue in the water and requires it to be thrown out, and in my case given a wipe, when the water is too low. This leads to having to use the kettle twice
Being told to meet someone at a club, be an idiot and wait 4 stupid hours in the cold and rain outside waiting for them, telling me all sorts of bullshit, while they were in the club the whole time
Being told I was an equity employment - I guess for the Americans know it as D.E.I, and told I would basically be stuck at the position I will be applying for. A few years later, I am in essense doing work outside of speciality for the lower position pay, which the company was transistioning towards, I hate it because they are doing everything they can to “extract value while cutting costs” and pushing that narrative and then when I do not perform to satisfaction be rhetorically asked if do I not want to be promoted - which I know is just a bs ploy to try make me work harder because I will never be promoted.
Having my personal social information be discussed behind my back without asking permission - example having someone tell my parents above my relationship with someome in high school.
In high school,telling someome to leave me alone and they repeatedly violated that space, made worse when my parents allowed said person to come near when I expressly displayed in action to not want to engage with them. It ended up with a emotive kangaroo kick when they pushed to far and me going for a very angry through bushes to avoid being followed.
I do not know if all this qualifies, but that is all I can think of off the top of my head, I am willing to amend points that do not meet criteria
deleted by creator
Housing market in the USA. You can make 100k and cannot afford a piece of trash house. Who the fuck can afford all these houses? Are people really that damn rich? It seems so many are that rich and able to buy everything…
Hypocrisy
People saying something factually incorrect and insisting on it.
The speed of other people’s windshield wipers.
3 drops of rain and your wipers are set to Warp 12? I’m irrationally angry and judging the fuck out of you.
Full monsoon and your wapers are set to “occasionally, if I feel like it”? I’m irrationally angry and judging the fuck out of you.
I used to drive 15 miles each way to work in an old job that I quit in less than three months
One of my worst commutes was when the floodgates opened and rain pelted down so hard that I couldn’t even see where I was going, even with the wipers set to Mach 12.
Imagine this on a motorway where the speed limit is 70mph…
Distracted driving because it seems like the government completely gave up on enforcing texting while driving laws.
More generally, drivers being completely unaware of their surroundings and causing almost accidents everywhere they go because everyone around them has to correct for them as to not cause an accident.
Adding to this to make it the driving/traffic related thread.
People that habitually refuse to use turn signals. I watched some Audi driving scumbag bob and weave between cars, changing lanes 5 times and using their signal once. The one time they signaled was to cut off another driver, nearly causing a wreck.
I drive an Audi (it’s okay, I’m a scumbag), but I 100% agree. And what’s with the people that signal the opposite direction they’re going?
And to stir the pot: stopping in the middle of the street to unload passengers when there’s loads of curbside parking available. Bonus points if they do all this and use their hazards as if that’s a valid use case.
Abuse of authority.
Any other form of misbehavior might make me feel sad, or sickened, or determined to make things better; but the only time I actually feel angry at the people involved is if they sought out a position of public trust and then betrayed that trust.
One of the emotions (Resentment) says its directed at those of higher status or authority. I wonder what the practical distinctions of that are if any. In any case, I consider them of lower status (contempt) because they engage in bad faith and destroy public trust and faith in systems meant to serve them, but it means we need to think strategically like how a corporation would think to mitigate their playbook
Can you post the list of 56 emotions? I would hate to burn a good story on Anger when Resentment is right around the corner and more applicable.
Save it for resentment aha, as for the list its trade secret and all that business ;) We’ll get there, enjoy the ride. I figure I’ll give each about 2 days of engagement and then move along to the next
I would distinguish between authorities who engage in ”bad“ behavior that’s inherent to the institutional role they’ve assumed (in which case my negative feelings are directed more toward the institution than the individual), and authorities who exploit their institutional roles to serve themselves.
That they made public shaming illegal in Europe. It would be so much easier to put those bastards to rest. Honor is important to them.
Everyday angry is usually due to stupid and/or entitled people, but as a teen I experienced blind rage before and that’s a lot harder to explain. You kind of blank out and go after someone, fast heart rate, high blood pressure, truly beast mode. That was usually from bullying or dealing with my alcoholic father, though.
Now a days anger is probably closer to irritation than anything. Which is kind of a shame, I used to use anger to get things done. I once was so angry at a teacher for an unfair C in an art class that I channeled that into the most haunted self portrait I think he ever saw for the final. I ultimately got an A. Does spite count as it’s own emotion? Lol
Like it says, these emotions are “designed” to mobilize you and your resources so that sounds perfectly on-brand :) Irritation and frustration are great too, they seem like bridge emotions to anger that you encounter first often and can limit the fallout from if you attend to them before they progress to anger
The question I like to ask myself is “What is this emotion trying to tell me” and “What would things look like longer term externally and internally if the trigger kept happening but I didn’t have the cue of whatever emotion like anger or fear or irritation” haha.
I’m notoriously good and becoming better by the day at like “Lets deal with this once and now and put it to bed” cuz I hate ongoing issues that could have otherwise been attenuated had I followed my instinct towards working it
Bob’s Furniture … fuck them.
Care to elaborate?
tl;dr - they suck all around and it took 8 months of constant pushing to fix
sorry for the shit formatting. I tried my best but it’s a lot to type lol
Oh, boy this will be a lot to type out… So I was shopping for couches, and as I have dogs I didn’t want anything super expensive. I had gotten a solid ad from them during this period so we decided to check them out. We found some decent love seats and I payed for the ‘worry-free delivery and warranty’ as I’m not a handy man. The delivery dudes showed up and they were like these exhausted looking 18 year olds. I felt this wasn’t going to go well so I pulled out my camera. Sure enough, they rip the first love seat. I note it on the video and they acknowledge but seem pretty ‘meh’ about it. They mention they have a repair man for these type of things and not to worry… the second couch they scratch up my newly finished floors. I kept my cool thinking this is why we got the insurance pack. I immediately open a ticket and everything seems to be going okay… They sent a repair man… and this is when things get weird. I take time off from work to meet with the guy and I answer the door and the guy just starts yelling at me in Spanish. He got lost and some how that was my fault? I don’t really know. Anyway he looks at the couch shakes his head and hands me a card and leaves. He didn’t say a word while I’m saying ‘Yo, what? where are you going? What’s going on man??’ I call the number and the customer service person was as confused as I was so she said she’d send a replacement next week. I take another day off of work as their window is basically ‘when we get there at this day.’ No one shows up. I call and they said they didn’t have a truck that day. Confused is turning to anger as this point… It’s worth mentioning at this point that I had left a job due to it almost being a requirement to argue and scream at people… I was really trying not to lean back into that as I know it’s not healthy. So, I suck it up and say okay and took another day off the following week.
A driver shows up and says ‘Okay where’s the couch I have to take?’
I try to correct him and say ‘You mean replace??’
He says he is only there to pick up a couch and and his truck is empty.
He looks at his paperwork and he’s like ‘hmmm, you know what there should be a couch in the truck actually… We’ll you can call customer service about this, but I’ll take the couch.’ Anger peaks his head as I reply, ‘Yeah, no… You’re not taking anything… I ordered a replacement and the way this is going… no way you’re taking it without replacing it.’
He was pretty chill about it and we call CSR again. Apparently the couch wasn’t transferred over or something. I don’t know… I was starting to rage and just didn’t want to communicate with anyone at this point. They schedule for the following week… I take off. NO ONE FUCKING SHOWS UP. I call and very sternly but professionally speak my grievances. She assigns a ‘special shipment agent’ to my case. At this point I start asking for some money back and the refund my insurance but I still have it. The. Next. Fucking. Week. No. One. Shows. I loose it on some CSR person but I feel like I kept my rage to the point and not focused directly at them. They basically promise me it’ll be there next week. Next week comes, and the at least this time they call me the day before, I get a call… And the lady tells me the couch has been discontinued and all they can do is offer a different couch or pick it up and refund it - for the first time in my life I was so utterly filled with rage all I heard for a bit was this weird buzzing noise. My whole face like became numb. My rage could no longer be contained. I started to hear normally and I just heard the lady on the line say ‘Sir? Sir? Are you still there?’ I frighteningly whisper back into the phone ‘I want my money back’. "Sir per our policy we have to pick up the couch then,’ she replies. I tell her that I will no longer speak to her and need to speak to her manager. I have to wait for the call and I take it at work. Basically their policy requires them to get the couch back if i wanted a refund and they weren’t going to fix my floors either a separate company handles their insurance. She tells me she’s done talking to me and gave me the regional number. I don’t remember who hung up on whom as it was a fairly heated. I called the number after work as I wanted to cool off… the next part I’m not super proud of. I only say this to really speak to my rage at this point - but the dude that picks up sounded like he was Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite. Normally I’m far more patient with folks like that as they remind me of my grandparents. I was beyond being nice and basically told him that he couldn’t help me and I wanted to speak to his supervisor as I was instructed. He assured me if I told him my issues he could help.
I warn him again that ‘you don’t want this heat brother please just transfer me.’ He tells me to tell him my tale. I said to him ‘well I’m sorry but you asked for this.’ I completed unloaded on this poor dude with a expletive filled rant that I don’t really remember… but I do remember screaming in the phone ‘And you’re fucking me man! I don’t want to be fucked and all I’m getting is fucked in my ass, now fucking transfer me please.’ Poor dude whimpers back ‘…okay… transferring…’ The regional person was zero help and basically told me enjoy my couch then holes and missing pillows. My rage was not satisfied and I blew up their socials. In the meantime, I opened a ticket with this insurance company. It was such a weird company and if I hadn’t gotten the information directly from the store I would have assumed it was a scam. Like their website was from the early 2000’s and they didn’t have a physical office. So they ask for a quote, which I already had and they didn’t like it. So they sent out someone that quoted it more than my contractor. They ghosted me for a bit. In the meantime the social media play seems to be gaining traction and I get a call from some really nice dude that like head of like the entire east sides customer service. He profusely apologizes and says he’ll see what he can do… He all but tells me that this was the normal Bob’s experience but they were restructuring. He got the insurance company to reply… They offered me 300$ for a 2,000$ repair. I called him back and he was flabbergasted and said he was escalating it. Insurance company mails me a 500$ check…The check bounces for insufficient funds. Head dude calls me and is totally confused and tells me that he wishes I had payed with paypal because he was telling me I should file a BBB complaint and such. I do so against both companies. Insurance company wants to do a wire transfer… I give them VERY SPECIFIC instructions with parts highlighted as my bank is a little weird with that stuff. They sent me a receipt of the transfer and it doesn’t even have my name on the transfer nor account number… I reply back and said ‘I hope you enjoy just losing money.’ They open an investigation on my fucking account as they think I stole the money. Meanwhile BBB got Bobs to refund me for a fair chunk of the cost of the couches. Investigation over and they sent me a friggen money order for 750$. So overall I kinda made out but… not really if you think about the floors that had to be redone and all the time I took off and spent on dealing with them… so yeah fuck em. That took 8 fucking months.That’s crazy bro. I’m sorry this happened, or alternatively I’m glad it happened.
Yeah that sounds like standard Bob’s Furniture. My dad often ordered from them, and still does since he never seems to learn and low prices hijack his common sense.
Canal Digital. Scammers.
Lemmy censorship. U cant say the word “retarded” but you can call for the literal murder elon musk. It makes me angry the mods are too blinded by political bias to apply the rules equally.
You spelled “Waaaaaaaaaaah! I got banned for being an insensitive bigot!” wrong.
Explain how its insensitive or bigotry? It has the exact same origins and meaning as moron and dumb whats the difference?
I’m not going to explain to you why calling people a “retard” is wrong. I have no doubt that you know already that it is insensitive and offensive- and you’re here to troll the subject.
Do better.
It’s much worse on Reddit. There is a growing lexicon of words you can’t even use in a comment without having a bot swoop in and nuke your post from orbit, all because a snowflake moderator doesn’t like reading them.
I too get your sentiment about Lemmy’s double standards. At least Spez was consistent about banning people for calling for the literal murder of billionaires.
Case in point. Larry Ellison, CEO of Oracle, recently shared his vision of using AI powered mass surveillance to ensure everybody was on their best behaviour. Pretty much everybody on Lemmy called for him to be guillotined, whereas on Reddit such a comment would net you a permanent ban.
At least Spez was consistent about banning people for calling for the literal murder of billionaires.
U know lemmy has problems when u have to give spez props.
U cant say the word “retarded”
That’s only the case on lemmy.ml, that’s been disabled on most of the instances
can call for the literal murder elon musk.
On which community did this happen?
Just do one search for ‘guillotine’ and you’ll find a heapload of comments on Lemmy world and Lemmy.ml
Lemm.ee acvount commenting on a lemmy.world community got my account full deleted for saying retarded. And just use the lemmy search and type guillotine and u will get hundreds of examples on world and .ml.
In r/wallstreetbets they use the word regarded instead, which is just funny to me. People buying stocks at the wrong time can be hilarious, even though sometimes sad of course.
I like that im gonna steal it and if its that easy to bypass power hungry lemmy mods censorship then ill be impressed.
