idk just a random scenario stuck in my head

  • You retain all intelligence.
  • You must have confirmation yourself that your message reached the president.
  • You can’t pick human as your animal.
  • The president as referring to Joe Biden. Other country presidents are accepted though.
  • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Parrot, probably the African Grey. Because you can talk. Being a talking bird with a heck of a vocabulary asking to get a message to the president is probably going to get the White House social media office’s attention, and maybe then the president.

    Kinda cheating, but that would probably work.

    • bionicjoey@lemmy.ca
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      6 months ago

      OP said you retain your own intelligence, so I don’t see why a parrot would be any better than any animal with lips and vocal chords that could theoretically support humanlike speech.

  • morgunkorn@discuss.tchncs.de
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    6 months ago

    I’d become a loving purring cat and would look for a household that would treat me like I treat my cats right now. They’re the 1% of the animal kingdom, might as well get the animal life I won’t ever get as a human. Not even trying once to do the president quest.

  • kromem@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    I’d be the President’s dog. And then I’d just need to get their attention at that point, so I’ll keep biting his secret service agents until finally they start to wonder what’s up. It shouldn’t take more than 3 or 4 bites for people to realize I’m trying to send a message, right?

    • rbn
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      6 months ago

      Couldn’t you just draw in the sand with a stick? I think if there’s an ape who’s fluent in English handwriting that would make it to the news pretty fast.

  • NegentropicBoy@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Dog. Go around being surprisingly helpful to people, become famous, visit President, write message very clumsily with a pencil in my mouth, sell rights to movie, profit.

  • Shard@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    This is the Rick and Morty episode where rick becomes a turkey to get pardoned isnt it?

  • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    I love how 80% of the comments are “Fuck the president, I want to be an animal!”

    I don’t disagree.

  • AlolanYoda@mander.xyz
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    6 months ago

    My country’s president is clearly heading towards dementia. I’d be a crow, they can just speak, so I’d simply fly to him and tell him. He’d probably believe me, no questions asked.

  • fiercekitten@lemm.ee
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    6 months ago

    I’m turning into a red panda, forgetting all about the president, and living my best life: eating fruit, lazing about, getting tons of cuddles for being cute and smart 🙂

    • rammer
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      6 months ago

      Plot twist: You don’t live in a zoo or as a pet. You are in the wild forests of South West China that are being logged. You run for your life as your habitat is being destroyed.

  • Tanis Nikana@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    I’d turn into a big old land tortoise and then just be a turtle.

    Benefits:

    • strong shell
    • feets for marching
    • cute tail bump
    • adorable smile
    • can flip friends over when they need help
    • turtle