I want a rundown of all the crimes House commits and what % of episodes contain felonies.
Cause they’re certainly missing the “Foreman, break into the dudes house and tell me everything in his crawlspace” scene, and the “Cameron, lie to him and drug him with this non-approved treatment and let’s see if he starts dying quicker or slower.”
Nearly every episode contains a felony since he’s constantly taking medication obtained via prescription fraud.
That came later, I think at least to begin with he was just prescribing to himself, then lost privileges.
I don’t think it is outright illegal to prescribe yourself drugs. Judy discouraged.
I don’t think it is outright illegal to prescribe yourself drugs. Judy discouraged
Nah, it’s super illegal. At least in the version of New Jersey the show takes place in.
They point that out a couple of times during the run of the series and if memory serves, that’s actually one of the few crimes of his that he ALMOST gets in real trouble for.
That and stealing Wilson’s prescription pad to make it seem like he’s the one prescribing them. Which is of course a couple seperate crimes 😄
He did kind of sort of run a goddamn car through a house. Then he went to jail for exactly one fucking episode.
Was that the Lin Manual Miranda episode? Or was he in the rehab arc? It’s been so long.
It was a big season finale, i think leading to the second to last season? He drove his car into Cuttys house and went to jail but then they released him on a work release program right back to the hosptial.
Admittedly I haven’t put that much effort into this search, but I am surprised to learn that the real life New Jersey apparently does not have this law in the criminal code. Most other places do though!
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Literally the best part of every episode is when the hospital doctors break into the patients home and start ransacking it looking for clues as to their illness, which as we all know, is taught semester 1 in medical school. Semester 2 is when you learn how to do actual medical tests.
The disconnect from reality is so ridiculous. IRL you can be bleeding from your forehead with a giant gash in your skin, and they’ll be like “we’re not really sure what the problem is, and we don’t care. Let’s run blood work. We’ll get back to you in 5 days, but only if anything from the tests comes back positive. Other than that, pay your $785 before you leave, and then get the fuck out”.
I agree. We basically need this format, but for House:
Not to bring things down but… when you’ve been dealing with an undiagnosed illness which has gone on for months (i.e. me), you’ll be happy to take someone with the bedside manner of Dr. House as long as you get some sort of answer.
And no, it isn’t lupus.
Have you considered it’s all in your head? /s
The funny thing is we actually considered some sort of brain issue, but according to my neurologist after seeing my MRI, I have a very healthy brain.
Of course, that doesn’t mean I’m not imagining things. Who knows? Anything could be psychosomatic.
Note that neurology is a science at an infant stage. Not only do we have limited tools to analyze the brain, we barely know how it works. In contrast, even though plenty of forms of cancer are very difficult to treat, we have a solid understanding of how it works, we just have difficulties creating remedies that are safe and effective for all forms of cancer.
Things could be psychosomatic, but I was being sarcastic for a reason. Many people dismiss other’s pain as psychosomatic as a quick way to ignore their needs. I say trust yourself as much as it makes sense to do so.
Actually, it’s not a pain thing. I’m in no pain from it at all. It’s just a mystery. I dry heave every morning like I have morning sickness (unlikely due to, like, having a penis) and I have been unable to eat solid food since August (I had another six-week bout in March). I live on Ensure and Gatorade. I have had a ton of tests- X-rays, labs, an MRI, a HIDA scan and two EGDs (where they send a scope down your throat). I have had a biopsy of my stomach. I have had my gallbladder removed. Nothing has changed. So I have an appointment at the Mayo Clinic for the end of March (unless someone cancels and I can get in sooner) where hopefully I’ll meet my Doctor House and get this sorted out.
But there’s no pain and very little discomfort. I feel fine most of the time. I can live a relatively normal life despite this, although obviously I have fairly low energy. I mean it sucks not eating, I’d love to eat. A new Nepalese restaurant opened here. I’ve never even had Nepalese food! I drive by it all the time and look at the pictures outside and think, “wow, I wish I could eat that.” But I can’t. It’s not nausea, it’s a total aversion to food. The smell, the texture, etc. And no hunger ever. My GP described it as similar to anorexia but with a physical cause. We just don’t know what that cause is.
The only positive is that I’ve lost 70 pounds and am 10 pounds away from my ideal weight. I still look fat, but hey, we can’t have everything. So I do recommend having a mystery illness where you can’t eat if you want to lose weight. It works better than Ozempic!
I hope you get that all sorted, good luck!
Thanks!
I actually remember reading about a case similar to yours on cracked.com of all places. The guy would vomit out any food he ate and it continued for months.
Apparently, he had a respiratory infection, but instead of lungs it went to his guts and messed his digestive system up. He ended up taking antipsychotics to trick his body into thinking that everything was fine.
Hooray. Unfortunately, that’s not me. For one thing, when this started I was on an antipsychotic (not because I’m psychotic, it’s for a nerve disorder, but I don’t take it anymore) and for another, and this is one of the weird parts, I never have thrown anything up. It’s always a dry heave. Even when I was able to eat.
Not to be too gross, but how’s your poo?
Have you had Covid (or Covid symptoms) shortly before this started happening? I think the new booster didn’t come out until September.
It is what you would expect from someone who has a diet low in fiber.
And I had COVID in between the bouts of not eating.
Also, no offense meant here, but I really do not want medical advice over the internet from people I don’t know.
Completely understandable. Some doctors are reluctant to consider long COVID, even though food aversion could be caused by it.
Good luck getting to the bottom of it. I’d be freaking out the more mysterious it gets. Especially for a GI issue since they can get a pretty damn good look at the whole thing from several angles.
Re: the fiber…not even liquid Metamucil? I’d be feeling terrible if I was going months without a good poo. That’d probably be more difficult for me than living off ensure (considering I had voluntarily done several week juice-fasts or just soylent+coffee)
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I’m sorry to hear it.
That’s one of the signs of lupus. /s
How do your shoes look? Could be butthole worms
At an opposite corner of the spectrum, you can rarely find doctors as smug as House but as unable to help you as all the others you have previously visited.
It’s never lupus
Except that one damn time.
Butthole worms are verrrrrrrry common.
Also,use a bidet guys.
Are they generally thirsty, too?
That’s not how a bidet works. Too much pressure; it’s their showers. They love being clean.
Are we NOT drinking shower water now?!
So in most homes I’ve been the piping organ water is all the same for toilets, showers and the kitchen.
So is there any difference from the water that comes out of a shower head? Or hell even the garden hose outside
Garden hose is a bit different. Bacteria can get in through the hoses open end, and it’s really hard to completely dry out the inside, so it’s just a microbe fest inside there. The issue isn’t so much the plumbing, straight from the spigot is… Well, still a bit worse because it’s outside but should be ok. It’s the hose that’s the problem. Beyond that, yeah water in any tap inside should be essentially the same, barring filters after the plumbing.
Edit: just thought, some houses may use a grey water recycling system for, say, running the toilet and shower. I imagine that’s rare enough that if it applies to you, you probably already know, but… Well, ya know.
There is a slight issue…there was a time when a lot of spigots were made with brass containing high levels of lead.
The amount of exposure from infrequent, or even sparodic use over several year, is more than likely nothing to worry about though.
Even still, when shopping for a spigot, you’ve got to be careful. A lot are marked “Non-Potable Use” for that reason.
Also I feel something is gross about drinking from places we don’t usually drink from. Like we use different cleaning products there and we clean them less frequently, and they seem inferior to me as a result. Especially the bathroom sink. Like someone just pooped three feet away from it a couple hours ago and then touched the thing and uuuuuggggghhhh.
Yeah I mean you should probably just drink from the normal tap if it’s not inconvenient to do so, and I do get the ick factor. Just saying it probably isn’t very different for any interior faucet, and only marginally so for an outside spigot.
My dog seems to think so
unless life gives you chocolate pow-pow, make lemons🤌🏿
They left out lupus. Always gotta rule out lupus.
It’s never lupus. Except that one time when it was lupus.
Awww why’d you post the one without the audio?
I know that it’s probably on purpose and supposed to be funny in itself but holy shit did he fellate that poor microphone! Almost made it unwatchable!
It almost sounded like he was speaking through a kazoo
I didn’t know a kazoo could scream in pain like that 😄
‘You are a black man.’ Has lived rent free in my head for years
House was the only medical show for me that was able to be this predictable, and I would watch. Hmmm… maybe time for another watch.
It’s because the show wasn’t about the medicine or solving the case, it was about what it cost to be House.
Yeah, but considering it’s supposed to be Sherlock Holmes as a doctor, shouldn’t it at least be a little bit about solving the case?
Before anyone questions it being a Holmes show, since that seems to have gone over so many people’s heads:
House = Home (Holmes)
Both of their colleagues are named Watson
Both use deduction to solve mysterious cases (medical vs criminal) that no one else can crack.
Both live at 221B Baker Street
Both have drug issues
Both play musical instruments in order to think things through
House is shot by a man named Jack Moriarty (Moriarty is frequently presented as a nemesis of Holmes)
You forgot the most important factor.
The writers literally said they based House off of Sherlock Holmes stories.
House has Wilson, Holmes has Watson
Also mysteries are frequently solved in a way the audience could not have known because it was with information only House/Holmes had. But it’s expected in a medical drama because the audience isn’t full of doctors.
Both live at 221B Baker Street
For real? I never watched House, but him being inspired by Holmes doesn’t surprise me given the idea I got through pop-cultural osmosis. But he actually lives on the same address? That sounds a bit too on the nose.
Wait no way really? It’s basically a ripoff then? Never watched the show but do they bill it as such?
It’s an homage. Also, House’s confidante is Wilson, not Watson.
It’s an adaptation, not a rip-off
You could call Elementary and Sherlock ‘rip-offs’ too. The fun thing about public domain material is that anyone can do whatever the hell they want with it. Personally, I think all three shows were good (or at least started as good).
I really liked House. I don’t know shit about medicine, but my whole job is troubleshooting, and the troubleshooting in the show has actually helped me.
Some big takeaways…
Most hard to solve issues are really just a combination of 2 or 3 simple issue acting together in a weird way.
Everybody lies - I don’t necessarily agree with this in my line of work, but I frequently use “Not everybody tells the truth” as a better rule. I can’t recall having a client lie to me, but every day they tell me things that are wrong or untrue because they don’t understand what happened.
When in doubt, do a shit-ton of pain killers and berate people for not having the answer, even though you don’t have it yourself (shift blame/expectation management)
Not enough lupus
It’s never butthole worms.
Remember that one episode where it was actually lupus?
It’s never lupus
It’s great when you watch it off and on but it’s painful binging it.
All the Sherlock Holmes type derivatives are much like that, back in the day when I would watch a bunch of episodes it was mostly enjoyable because Hugh Laurie is just such a great actor.
Lupis was always the metaphorical man caught holding the gun lol
You should try Jeremy Brett’s version of Sherlock Holmes. I didn’t binge it, but it was pretty good for that old timey kind of show.
The series ended 2 seasons before the finale. I cannot be convinced otherwise
It’s ok to be wrong <3
The same-y ness of the episodes really stands out when you do this. On a binge, I found myself watching it more for the character arcs than the diagnostic drama… which is not the show’s strong point. :(
it was made for the once a week way of watching. just choose a day to be house day every week. instantly better experience
It’s weird how a lot of those types of shows seem different just a few years later, in the streaming/binge-watching era.
Those types of shows…House, CSI, etc…the formula itself just gets so dull and routine over and over again with nothing in between.
Conversely, long drawn out dramas that don’t reset 90% of the stage every episode, like Breaking Bad work really well. I’d say it even works well for most of GoT.
In fact, I’d say it makes some shows better. “Lost” was a big letdown for people watching it week to week and season to season over the course of nearly six years. But when I binge-watched it for the first time over a few weeks, I don’t think it was nearly as bad as an ending as people make it out to be.
I never watched Weeds all the way through. I quit when it started getting too self-aware and cliche (somewhere around the tunnel). It was just right before that, and it started to fall off. I think watching it in a binge manner might be a bit more quaint because that shark-jumping becomes part of its charm.
Part of what made LOST enjoyable was the wait between episodes, and the rabid fandom that generated. Fan forums were all over the place, and people just kept lobbing theory after theory out there about WTF was going on. Add in frame-by-frame breakdowns, the few times writers proved a few fans true on some truly wild ideas, and the official ARGs, and it just became this whole phenomenon. Neither of the show’s endings were ever going to live up to that hype, and in retrospect, makes those takes as much in the moment as the show itself.
Re-watching it on a binge is doable, but more closely emulates what the producers experienced prior to broadcast. Which is to say it’s entertaining, but not the same entertainment.
Yes, this is a fair point. The wait between episodes was just as important as the episodes themselves. All the community buildup, discussion, fan theories, etc.
That may not be the majority of viewers, but they certainly are your shows “free” hype men. They’re the ones that’ll tell everyone they know who would be interested (pre-qualified leads!) all about their favorite new obsession. They’re also the ones that’ll buy merch, or name their kid after Daenerys Targaryen (they say that Danielle is an old family name and they just call their girl Danni for short but you know it’s because they were heavy GoT watchers).
Maybe that’s part of why streaming services are going back to weekly (i.e. Handsmaid Tale) or split-season (i.e. Stranger Things) releases. It’s not just for profit…the suspense between the episodes can be just as, if not more, valuable and enjoyable as the episodes themselves.
Maybe that’s part of why streaming services are going back to weekly (i.e. Handsmaid Tale) or split-season (i.e. Stranger Things) releases. It’s not just for profit…the suspense between the episodes can be just as, if not more, valuable and enjoyable as the episodes themselves.
I’d say so. If nothing else, consider what a proper episode-end cliffhanger is to experience in that scenario. It’s a radically different thing.
LOST is one of my favorite shows ever. I’m jealous of people who got to watch it live and discuss at work the next day. I think a lot of people watched it just for the mysteries though and not for the characters, the ending is much better from a character arc perspective versus a question answering perspective
Hard disagree
well painful might be a bit overboard but it does get repetitive pretty fast for me personally.
Yup, consistently entertaining for as long as it ran. hahah, what a fun show.
Cuddy: You can’t set your patient on fire, House! House: I only need to burn him for a few minutes. It’ll make your ass look thinner. Cuddy: Fine. Just do it while the lawyer is out to lunch.
I should watch house again.
That’s why it’s such a good show!
