- cross-posted to:
- shitposting@lemmy.ml
- cross-posted to:
- shitposting@lemmy.ml
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“I understand your mental health problems and your efforts to be your best self. The pros of spending time with you outweigh the cons; you have not lost my affection.”
vs
“This topic brings my discomfort with you to the fore. Join me in a mutual lie so that we can continue our suffering and never make progress.”
True friends always bring the hard truths
There’s always the literary alternative:
“In that direction,” the Cat said, waving the right paw 'round, “lives a Hatter; and in that direction,” waving the other paw, “lives a March Hare. Visit either you like; they’re both mad.”
“But I don’t want to go among mad people,” Alice remarked.
“Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat; “we’re all mad here. Do you play croquet with the Queen today?”
We all are crazy, and that’s okay. Hang with me and we’ll figure out how to manage it.
In the meantime, I love you and am with you.
(This may be a bit sappy but it applies to friends and lovers alike.)
It’s not my place to invalidate the way you feel about yourself. Plus, my grasp on sanity is tenuous enough as it is, I’m in no place to judge another lol.
I like crazy. How can you not be crazy in a world like this? That’s a pretty sane reaction to me.
Is this meme an autism test? I can legit not tell if this is good or bad, or what emotion the pic is showing.
It’s bad. The original question is being used as a… standard conversation piece, here (though I’ve never heard that one IRL, I’m not surprised). Like “How are you”, “good, how about you”, “good” (which is in reality pretty much just a greeting), the person in the meme is saying “i’m sorry, I don’t have an excuse for my behavior” (“sorry I’m crazy”).
The expected response is reassurance on the second part (“no you’re not” to “I’m crazy”), but the received response is reassurance on the first (“it’s okay” to “sorry”). This implies that the other person does believe the first person is crazy, but the first person didn’t actually 100% mean the “I’m crazy” bit, so it’s an accidental insult that the first person can’t actually contest in any way and it hurts more because the other person must believe that for real. Therefore, unpleasant, but keeping it in. Hence the face.
Hope that made some sense!
But also if someone is fishing for reassurance and keep getting it, they’ll keep doing it.
If someone really is being unreasonable and is fishing for reassurance, the responsible thing is to tell them nicely what you really think.
People tend to experience and therefore express multiple emotions simultaneously.
I am autistic
Im pretty sure this is Love Quinn from the tv show “You.” She is like murder people to get what she wants crazy. I guess the expression is more of an “are you sure about that” or maybe something related to whatever scene this came out of idk, we in the same boat here
Or maybe it was meant to be said with the expectation of a “no youre not” and shes upset because she takes it as him calling her crazy
Well I am definitely autistic and I have absolutely no idea. Best to just smile and move on with your life.
If you know you are not crazy, saying “sorry, I’m crazy” is an outright lie.
So, people will assert a false statement and get upset at an honest response? TF is wrong with normies?
Even if I am completely aware that they are lying, I generally don’t get a positive response when I call them out on it.
I’ll just smile and nod and dismiss whatever they said.
Absolutely everybody with maybe the exception of some well-sorted zen monks is crazy. It’s one of those things we learn in the wacky ward (or in my case, a partial-hospitalization program). Imagine a line going from healthy-brain to maximum-damaged brain (where ASD folk at the high end of the spectrum fall), they run:
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- Healthy
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- Neuroses (personal conflicts: I like ice cream but I also want to be lean). The best of us are here. But that’s few.
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- Personality disorders (APD, BPD, NPD, Being Donald Trump, probably). Note this is not too damaged, just in a way that makes psycho-killers
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- Psychosis, not to be confused with psychopathy which is not a psychology term but a forensic term. This is where BPD, Major Depression and so on go.
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- Schizophrenia, which literally means fragmented mind
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- Autism, according to the 1990s (pre-DSM-V) model, when it was called Autism and not ASD.
Since (according to my psychiatrists, ASD is a symptom of a high density of neurons that lead to crossed wires a lot, called kindling. When it takes place in the motor-function part of your brain, you end up with epilepsy.
ALSO: In since the industrial age and the end of extended family homesteads and the beginning of nuclear families, our resilience to domestic abuse has plummeted. (When there were aunts and uncles and grandmas around to run to when dad got drunk and handsy, it helped us manage our mental health as kids. Now we don’t have that support, and parenting has gotten worse as industrial and clerical jobs demand more of our time, so that by the 1970s, no one is actually around to parent (or to do research for civic duties). So we all are suffering from intergenerational insanity. At least it is my hypothesis.
I’m a well-sorted Zen Monk in your chart, but you’d really rate autism as more brain-damaged than literal schizophrenia?
The walking, raving, hallucinating, spiders in the skin, swimming walls, schizophrenia?
Many people with autism can lead moderate to fully functioning lives, i.e: A good chunk of YouTube content producers who churn out daily videos about a single, highly constrained topic (e.g: bridge reviews in multiple nations).
I think I’d put autism in Category 2 of your chart, leaving the rest where it is
P.S: I agree with your intergenerational insanity hypothesis; I’d summarize it as intergenerational trauma, actually, like a psychological debt deferred to progeny with interest
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You’re right, let me prefix with that.
It’s not unusual for normies to casually throw out a self deprecating statement when fishing for a complement; eg., “Ugh, I’m such an ugly cow today” - to which the expected response is something like “no babe, you look SOOO good!”
Personally, I’ve tended to ignore such statements entirely, which has shrunk the number of people who speak to me significantly…and I am just fine with that.
Do with that information what you will, but I’m also neuro-spicy - so don’t use my behavior as a measuring stick.
I’m also autistic and I discovered (accidentally, when I reacted earnestly once) that if you say “I’m sorry you think that, do you want to talk about your self image?,” it ends the conversation without ending the relationship (useful for colleagues or similar).
Oh, I like that a lot.
I can’t tell if it’s anti passive-aggression or ultra passive-aggressive, but it works, lol.
Haha that explains it so well!
There have been times my wife would say stuff like that. When I give the wrong response, she’d say “I was fishing for a compliment.”
At this stage in the conversation, any compliment is received as “forced”. Apparently after directly requesting compliment, it’s impossible to receive a genuine response.
I’m certain this wouldn’t be posted if the emotion was just neutral.
Expressions of crazy people rarely match their emotions. Or so I’ve been told(?)
I’m one of the most empathetic mfers to ever grace this earth (and humble too) and it’s ambiguous for sure.
Both the dialogue AND the woman’s expression in the photo. (Though, in my experience, someone who’s being self-deprecating like this isn’t looking for comfort, but a compliment.)
I question whether anyone can remain entirely sane. We all have idiosyncrasies and delusions, and anyone denying they have them would be either a liar or terrifyingly inhuman.
Nearly everyone seems at least slightly crazy to me, definitely including me, but especially neurotypicals.
(chuckles) I’m in danger.
its not ok
