‘Leigh 🏳️‍⚧️

I’m queerly the 'Leigh you searched for! 😉 I do tech things, enjoy pinball, try to draw, make a little music now and then, occasionally jump in the ocean and breathe underwater, and marvel at how I’ve lasted this long in this world. Trying to do my part to make it better.

Trans demigal (she/her)

  • 5 Posts
  • 156 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 9th, 2023

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  • Thank you for sharing this. I was absolutely FURIOUS with news outlets who thought her name change (and ESPECIALLY her deadname) was “newsworthy” in 2022, because she made it crystal clear that she wanted NOTHING to do with this man. She is NOT a public figure. It was nothing but gossip. And having myself been outed against my wishes in a well-known publication for the sake of gossip (albeit with WAY less publicity) I can tell you that can REALLY fuck someone up for a long time.

    And now that manbaby Elon is publicly and explicitly dragging her through the mud, deadnaming and misgendering her to millions, and blaming her for his right-wing shitlording. She shouldn’t have to give an interview like this, though I certainly understand why she opted to. She should just be able to live her damn life in quiet peace. I feel for her so much.


  • After reading the community’s pinned “Rules Breakdown” post, I can easily see how Your post violated their rules. 🤷‍♀️ And as another poster in this thread points out, it appears You’re just on a time-out, not a perma-ban.

    Also, I will capitalize “you” for You as an act of politeness, but I very strongly disagree with characterizing this as “misgendering”, even after reading Your “Introduction to capitalised pronouns” post. Yes, grammar is socially defined and arbitrary. For example, the only reason African-American Vernacular English is labelled “improper” is because so many (white) people with power say so — there’s nothing inherently worse or better about it. However, it’s still necessary to reach consensus on the meaning of words, else no one could be understood.

    Capitalization of Your pronoun is clearly very important to You, and it would be thus be unkind of me to refuse to accommodate You when it’s pointed out, but English is not a language where every pronoun is gendered. The capitalized version is an honorific form of the same pronoun, not a different pronoun altogether. And generally speaking, the use of honorifics (“sir” and “ma’am” being the most common ones) is becoming far less common these days. Perhaps it’s because honorifics are most frequently used to establish dominance and subservience roles, whether that be in customer service roles (“yes, sir”) or governing roles (“yes, Your Honour” or “yes, Your Majesty”). To borrow Your own example, even many Christians now refer to their god as “he” rather than “He” in written language. And of course, those of us who totally reject the notion of gods certainly don’t. Your insistence on capitalization as respect for Your divinity makes me genuinely uncomfortable as someone who doesn’t believe in divinity at all and certainly shouldn’t feel subservient to You.





  • I don’t know anything about gnomes and barely anything about TTRPGs, but this question makes me think about social vs. medical models of disability. In our modern-day society, the social model would mean that autism is only a “disorder” because society doesn’t accommodate our needs well enough (or, sometimes, at all). It isn’t a disorder to be allistic because it’s “normal”, “the default”, nothing more than that. For example, in a hypothetical society where people widely use language very literally, the behaviour of not taking things literally could be labelled a disorder. Or if the vast majority of people had sound sensitivity, then someone without it who often forgets to keep their voice down might be seen as disordered. So if you do decide to go with this idea, I think there might be something to explore there when gnomes are interacting amongst themselves vs. with other groups.

    If you’re concerned about “game author compares autistic people to gnomes”, is there a different class to use that might be a better choice? (I have no idea, but it sounds like maybe gnomes have a negative stereotype?)






  • How is anyone supposed to determine whether this was a good idea or not

    Ada’s judgment is not infallible, but I’d rather trust her judgment than go personally look for something she initially (and admitted mistakenly) thought was CSAM. There are two possible outcomes: (1) I see something that looks similar to CSAM to me and I feel gross about it, or (2) I don’t see any problem with the content, but it doesn’t change anything because she’s the admin here and is still unwilling to host copies of it on her server where she evaluates anything that gets reported.

    In either case, I can still enjoy content from LemmyNSFW elsewhere if I so choose — just not at Blahaj Zone.

    And this whole debate is literally declaring that legal adults don’t look right, and shouldn’t be allowed to post explicit images

    I think the two sides here are having different debates. Yes, there are legal adults who may appear underage, and they should have the same freedom any other adult has to post explicit pictures of themselves if they so choose. But a community that specifically encourages “child-like” content (as the community’s rules said at the time this decision was made) is going to gather multiple examples of this. Even if Ada fully trusts LemmyNSFW’s admins to 100% prevent any real CSAM from being federated, she’d still be exposed to reports of “potential CSAM” from there. She’s a community-building volunteer who willingly examines reported content that gets federated to Blahaj Zone, but she doesn’t want to view any more of it than is strictly necessary to protect her community. So she’s unwilling to federate with an instance that knowingly hosts such a community (even if the content is 100% legal) because it would cause more reports as time goes on. The content also upsets her on a personal level, which is fine — she’s a human being and is allowed to have feelings.

    Other admins at other instances might not have the same aversion to this specific type of legal content that Ada does, so maybe they don’t mind having it copied onto their servers. That’s cool. The Fediverse is great like that, users aren’t stuck with the decisions of any single person in charge. Ada announced her decision so that all we Blahaj Zone users would know about it, and if any of us feel strongly enough (and clearly a number of people do), we can vote with our feet and go use one of those other instances so we also don’t lose access to the communities we use here.

    This is my final comment on the matter. You may have the last word if you wish.




  • Oh please, no one here is calling anyone’s body “morally wrong”.

    I don’t need to “see if [I] agree or disagree with [the admin’s] assessment.” It wouldn’t make any difference whether I do or not. And it doesn’t matter what the community’s name is. By going to look, I’d be knowingly putting myself in a position to potentially see something that looks like CSAM. Why would I want to do that??

    But a lot of people made the choice to do that, presumably for the sake of arguing with an admin on an instance many of them don’t even use. That is disheartening.