The author asks 3 questions and makes an assumption about the answer to make his point. But they are dumb.

-If you play a song for three seconds and skip the rest, should it be eligible for royalties in the same way if you listen to a song all the way through?

Moot point because song streams are counted at 30 seconds, which he mentions later so wtf is he talking about.

-If you release a song and your mother leaves her phone playing it on a loop for two straight months, should each repeated play be eligible for royalties even though nobody was actually listening?

Yes, sure. Deal with it. That’s not that many plays or any significant amount of money.

If you listen to an album of white noise made for the express purpose of putting people to sleep should it generate royalties in the same way as when you listen to the music of Van Halen?

Yes, absolutely it should. Who gives a shit what kind of music is being listened to.

Yup

It has rained before