• LillyPip@lemmy.ca
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    10 months ago

    Dude, yeah. It’s so weird.

    I refused circumcision for my son (25 years ago, US hospital), and had to remind the staff several times because it was just assumed it would be done. I stopped them 3 times during different shifts when they were about to take him from our room for the procedure.

    Then when it came up in conversation when he was an infant, people would say to me ‘you should have done it’, because he would get infections (he never did), or he’d be bullied in gym showers (he never did to my knowledge), or whatever. My take was it should be his decision, not mine.

    The pressure was really intense, though. It’s weird how interested people can be in someone else’s infant’s penis. We’ve never talked about it, but reading stories from other men, I assume he’s happy being uncut, and I’m glad I didn’t do it.

    • Emerald@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      he’d be bullied in gym showers

      what? why would people be seeing your kids genitals in a gym shower? That makes no sense

      • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Have you never been in a highschool where using the gym showers was normal?

        Edit: shorts to showers because autocorrect has become dogshit

        • Emerald@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          I’m assuming you mean gym showers and not gym shorts. I still don’t get why someone would see someone elses penis in a gym shower. Unless they peeked into the stall or somathing, but that would be sexual harrassment.

              • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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                10 months ago

                My middle school gym locker room had completely open showers. Like the kind you see in prison scenes on TV. No dividers. No curtains. Just an open room with a bunch of shower heads

                  • el_abuelo@lemmy.ml
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                    10 months ago

                    Bit of an overreaction. Same-sex facility sharing has been a staple part of human society for thousands of years. We seem to have done okay so I’m not too worried or “horrified”. I guess it’s just not something you’ve come across so it seems unusual to you.

              • el_abuelo@lemmy.ml
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                10 months ago

                Depends I guess. They’re cheaper to do the open style so in poor schools and sports facilities you tend to get them.

                If you’ve been fortunate enough to go to decent schools and not played sports outside of well funded institutions then you probably wouldn’t have come across them.

    • Boldizzle@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      Where the hell did this infections BS come from? I’ve got mine and have never had any infections or am I just really lucky?

    • Serinus@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      My take was it should be his decision, not mine.

      It’s not though. They’ll never be able to go back and have it done as an infant. Time machines don’t exist.

      The procedure is much, much easier as an infant than it is as a boy or teenager or adult.

      I respect whatever decision you made. There are reasons for both. But no, he didn’t have the option to go back and have it done easily.

      And sorry about the pressure. You shouldn’t have to go through that, and I hope/expect that aspect is better after 25 years.

      • Darth_Mew@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        every slice and dice would be easier as an infant as you wouldn’t remember it anyway. you’re an idiot

        • nomous@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          Might as well just go ahead and remove their appendix and tonsils too right? They’ll heal right up and won’t remember a thing right?

        • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          I actually think about the ignored psychological effects of dealing with that level of physical pain so soon after being born a lot.

          Birth is already a traumatic experience for both mother and infant. But to then immediately, with no anesthesia, cut an extremely sensitive part of the infants body off? That has to leave some kind of mental scarring.

          • LillyPip@lemmy.ca
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            10 months ago

            I can actually speak to this.

            I was born with a genetic condition affecting my collagen (Ehlers Danlos), which meant my bones were overly soft and, since I was breach til moments before birth, my legs were bowed pretty severely. This was in 1971, and the treatment at that time was the doctors literally bent my legs into position manually and then braced them for my first few years. That’s not how they deal with it nowadays, because they learnt it was horribly painful.

            I don’t remember that initial experience, obviously, but my mother tells me several years later when I was a young child and having problems walking, she took me to the doctor and they finally worked out that I was in excruciating pain all the time. They asked why I hadn’t said anything and I told them it was because everyone was always in excruciating pain, but nobody else was complaining about it, so I shouldn’t either. I’d been in pain since birth, and just figured it was normal.

            That experience prevented me from getting proper care and made my early childhood hell. I still have emotional trauma from it. So yeah, early pain is not benign.