• fear@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    Everyone is so busy insulting the tenant doing the upgrades when it’s the landlord who behaved badly. If all we do is collectively blame victims when they get taken advantage of, society will crumble. This woman wasn’t stupid, she just didn’t have her guard up in preparation for the massive asshole who had power over her. There’s a difference.

    When you are trusting, you’re called stupid. When you trust no one, you’re called unreasonably cynical. They’re two sides of the same victim blaming coin. Start blaming the actual problem: predators.

    • deegeese
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      1 year ago

      Putting money into something you don’t own is stupid. Full stop.

      Never put money into a rental.

      • fear@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        Your advice isn’t helpful for people who don’t have the means to own their own home. Being trusting or naive isn’t something that should be shamed. There’s a way to educate people with kindness and compassion. People aren’t born knowing how to best handle the legal end of a renovation. But go on and call her stupid some more, that’ll help the onlookers. You and I and everyone in this comments section will be smart and secure with the claws we have dug into the insides of the pretty housing bubble. Perhaps if we bicker even more, the problem will disappear completely.

        • GlendatheGayWitch@lib.lgbt
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          1 year ago

          This tenant obviously is close to having the means to owning their own home. They blew ~50% of a down payment on a house that they don’t own.

          The smart thing to do, would have been save the money and use that towards a house of their own.

        • FiveMacs@lemmy.ca
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          1 year ago

          Kindness and compassion doesn’t always work. Sometimes the bold truth may hurt but can have more of an effect.

          At 400 lbs, you are a bit overweight and that’s ok

          Or…reality.

          You are morbidly obese and at risk of dying, slchange your life now.

          I’ll take blunt and effective over sugar coated nonsense any day.

          • fear@kbin.social
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            1 year ago

            Except shaming obesity doesn’t solve that problem, either. You’re kind of proving my point here without even realizing it.

        • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech
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          1 year ago

          Rather than pay that much for renovations on something she doesn’t own that would have been a great start for a down payment she could own.

          • fear@kbin.social
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            1 year ago

            I’m not arguing this point. Even though I disagree with how she chose to spend her money, I can still acknowledge that it’s not her fault the landlord took advantage of her and kicked her out to charge higher rent to the next person.

    • dingus@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I hate landlords as much as the next guy, but this is the stupidest thing ever. Would you also pay to deck out a rental car? No, you wouldn’t because you’re not the biggest dumbass on the planet.

      Like other commenters have stated, there are technically reasons why and how this could work, but a casual verbal agreement ain’t it, chief. Don’t reward massive dumbassery with pity.

      • GeneralVincent@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Well no one is living in a rental car for years. I understand what you’re saying but the comparison itself is pretty bad

      • fear@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        A proper comparison here would be more like a leased vehicle than a rental car. It’s not the “stupidest thing ever” for this tenant to believe she would be living there for 1 or more years and wouldn’t suddenly be evicted. Your exaggeration only benefits predators, and your pity is hardly a reward to anyone.

    • swan_pr@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      I agree that the landlord is a shitstain, but that tenant is not the best at decision making either. I can understand spending a couple of hundreds if it makes your life better, but she basically handed over a 12k check to that landlord. I can’t see any good reason to do this.

      • fear@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        Renting isn’t the greatest decision, either. You’re throwing money at a landlord and gaining zero equity. People often do it because it’s that or homelessness. These systems are in place to take advantage of people who aren’t the best decision makers. Just because they can be taken advantage of… should they be? Or should we be better than this and revamp how we house people so that it isn’t a massive scam with the opportunity for extra side scams like we see here?

        If the landlord wasn’t a massive dick, they both could have benefited from this situation. She’d have the renovated bathroom she wanted, and the landlord knew his property was being taken care of without even needing to lift a finger. Instead he got greedy, and rather than blame the greedy jerk people want to jump on the “stupid” victim. Except it’s not her fault her landlord was a prick.

        • dingus@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Renting can sometimes be more advantageous than owning. You don’t have to pay for maintenance and you have the ability to pick up and move a lot easier.

          I own now, and even though I own a very small condo and was able to put enough money down so that I don’t have to pay mortgage insurance…owning has been more expensive per month than renting for me… I get that it’s not always this way, but right now everything is shit for everyone.

          • fear@kbin.social
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            1 year ago

            True. Back when I rented it was a good situation because my rent was dirt cheap and I was able to save money. Seems those days are long gone with rentals sometimes being double or triple what a mortgage payment would be.

            • dingus@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              Nah I mean for me it’s the opposite. Buying something made my monthly cost much higher than renting. I was hoping it would do the opposite but that wasn’t the case. :/

        • swan_pr@lemmy.ca
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          1 year ago

          Renting is basically the only way to have housing in certain parts of the world. In large cities too. Not everyone that rents is bad at decision making or on the verge of homelessness…

          In this specific case, she was able to blow 12k in renos on a rental and has a Roche Bobois couch that’s worth at least 10k in the setup she has (she mentions this on her twitter feed). To be fair, she also says she realizes she made a terrible mistake and is taking the criticism in stride, so good for her, lesson learned. All this to say, yes she acted stupidly, regardless of how shitty the landlord seem to be.

          I agree with you that the housing system needs to change. That conversation has been going on forever. But the solution is not to have everyone strive to own a house.