• Driftking@lemmy.mlOP
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          1 year ago

          For the purpose of disclosure. I just cant live with myself if I do not tell prospective partners when they ask. I know there is a difference between avoidance and lying, however, I value honesty. Not implying that you are not or should thinknas I do

          • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Last year I shit myself while trying to open my door and get to the bathroom.

            I dropped my keys while I was trying to unlock the door and ended up with shit in my shoes that I had to throw away.

            I never bring that up on dates.

            • DrQuint@lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              I can’t agree. I think people should have a friendship as strong as their romance.

              • ChrisLicht@lemm.ee
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                1 year ago

                Some things are not made to be shared. You are two different people. Leave a little mystery.

                I’ve been with my partner for 27 years, so have a bit of experience to draw from.

          • TheActualDevil@sffa.community
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            1 year ago

            Is it typical to give a whole run-down of your sexual history when dating? Like, I’ve mentioned previous encounters or exes when it comes up, but rarely near the beginning of the dating process. In my experience people tend to not have those discussions. Not because it’s bad but because it doesn’t matter. When I meet a new woman and start seeing them, I don’t need to hear about or care about their past relationships unless it’s something they feel they want to share for whatever reason.

            It sounds like you don’t think sex work is immoral, so I wouldn’t bring it up unless it’s something that would actually affect your current relationship. If sex is casual enough to commodify then it’s not something that would be brought up when getting to know someone. Do you also give them a run-down of every meal you’ve ever bought at restaurants?

          • jayemar@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            The fact that you need to “disclose” this makes it sound like you yourself see an issue with it

        • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          OP’s out there on first dates asking if they have a problem with him doing it…

          I can’t imagine women are bringing it up

          • Driftking@lemmy.mlOP
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            1 year ago

            Not necessarily first dates. I just answer truthfully when the topic comes up. I don’t want to have it be a problem further down the line

            • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              I just answer truthfully when the topic comes up

              It’s just really hard to believe a women asks if you’ve had sex with a sex worker…

              Most people don’t ask for numbers, let alone details.

              • Driftking@lemmy.mlOP
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                1 year ago

                It has unfortunately come up before, hence my aprehension in approaching the topic.

                • melisdrawing@lemmy.world
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                  1 year ago

                  Seems like you got the intended consequence. If you want to be honest and your partner can’t handle that honesty, maybe it is better to keep looking. I have a very hard time maintaining lies to continue relationships, and as a result I have very few, but incredibly high-quality friends.

              • SpaceCadet
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                1 year ago

                It’s just really hard to believe a women asks if you’ve had sex with a sex worker…

                I’ve been asked that question, and not just one time, so I believe OP that it can sometimes come up.

                • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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                  1 year ago

                  Maybe because I’ve never lived somewhere it’s legal?

                  Like if there were brothels in the area, maybe it would be asked more?

                  • SpaceCadet
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                    1 year ago

                    Perhaps. It’s a legal grey area here, not strictly legal but tolerated in certain areas (red light districts), but it’s certainly not a socially acceptable thing.

              • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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                1 year ago

                I ask my partners because I do not want to be with someone who pays for sex. Simply because our views on sex would be very different which leads to problems in the relationship, from my experience. Also, it would be quite dumb to lie on this because than we are both just wasting our time.