when i was a child, i had a tendency to extremely hyper fixate on various topics for months, so now that i’m older it just feels like i’ve experienced everything even though I technically haven’t. the fixations are becoming much more quick in terms of cycles / how long they (don’t) last and i spend most of my time feeling bored and empty, just rotting away and feeling entertained by nothing. lately this has caused me to get really stuck in the past, so i spend a lot of time just laying in bed crate digging my own memories and feeling kind of depressed because i have nothing new to be excited by or interested in. it does not help that i don’t really have any long term goals or ambitions either, i just kind of exist.

does anyone else feel like this?

  • misk
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    5 months ago

    I don’t want to sound like an ass but its quite likely that much of your experience is caused by weed, especially being content with mediocrity and mild depression. I’m speaking from current experience of how much my perception of things is changing on a t-break.

    • gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works
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      5 months ago

      For real, dude. I was out of the country for about 3 weeks recently and holy fuck you start to really notice the difference about halfway through week 2.

      Since getting back, I’ve cut back a good bit, and I’m planning on letting my supply run out and not refilling it for a while, because if it’s in the house I’ll use it in an idle moment after work without even thinking sometimes.

      Also, the paradigm shift hits a LOT of things. I’m glad I did it. It’s helped me notice and actually acknowledge several pretty important things in my life - some good, some bad, some both.

      • goatbeard@lemm.ee
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        5 months ago

        Could you say more about this? I am smoking way too much weed but have been struggling to change my habits, especially since I’m unemployed atm

        • gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works
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          5 months ago

          Frankly, just stop buying, and let your stash run out. That’s a big part of how I cut back on drink, too, and why I’m doing that with my own stash now. It can be particularly difficult for people with adhd to find balance in moderation, in my experience. Simply not having it around, and only partaking when you’re out with friends or whatever has been a very useful tactic for me personally.

          At any rate, I know everyone’s different and has their own circumstances that affect the dynamic, but I wish you luck on your journey to find more balance. It’s way harder than most people understand it to be.