olivesandpoppies

What did I miss? Called out for what?

Thanks Moonchild:).

Traditional gender roles are so limiting. As soon as kids can vocalize what they want to wear (obviously within price reason), I think that you should let them lead what they want to put on their bodies and how they wanna wear their hair. It’s quite possible that all of her kids are always choosing what they wear.

My partner (part of the LGBTQIA2S community) and I don’t like or support gender reveal parties (or baby names that automatically reveal the gender assigned at birth- Even though we understood when we were naming our child a non-gendered name, that if they ended up being non-binary or transgender, that they might choose to change their name anyway). For the most part, when our kid was little, we did a lot of gender neutral type clothing, and so it has allowed our child to choose what they wear without influence from us or peers. Kids can also be non-binary but wear clothing that is matching their “assigned gender”. I would say if you shop online it’s easy to allow your child (who has a voice to do so, or even one who can point) to choose the shirts, pants dresses, etc. that they would like to wear and then just make sure you buy them in the appropriate measurements. Bringing a child to get their hair done professionally is a big trigger for kids, who don’t feel comfortable coming out to their parents, who have sort of pressured them even subconsciously to perform certain gender roles. Sometimes having a child circle pictures in a magazine or a flyer of hair styles that they like, and not only showing them images of the same gender is an easy way to let them decide which hairstyle they would like to have.

It’s still so wild to me that we have separate sections in stores for clothing and for toys. Sizing and I don’t mean bull crap sizing but like actual inches or centimeter measurement should be the only thing that is organized and stores. This way anybody can walk into any store and grab what they want without feeling like it’s “the wrong section”. But that’s work that stores need to work on.

I loved frilly poofy dresses and long hair as a child even though my mom had short hair and never wore “feminine” clothing. I would have been over the moon at that age to meet princesses and see all of those things but I was also a tree climbing, jumping in lake type of kid. When I was a teen, I had buzzed hair, I was not judged by my family for choosing my own clothing etc. I’m a cisgender woman, and it’s a very easy life compared to my family and friends who are non-binary or trans (and who aren’t “passing”).

Just like schools don’t indoctrinate kids to be trans, a lot of parents don’t force kids to be a specific gender- but we see traditional gender roles everywhere and familiarity and availability means a lot of kids choose “traditional”. Thankfully, there are many millennials, and GenZ parents who are well informed and are slowly healing from a patriarchal cisgender centered world, and they are doing the work to support kids. It’s also really common for parents unconsciously to say things like “oh, what dog do you want” or “oooh look at the cars! Which one do you want?” Kids love their parent(s) , and will oftentimes play sports their parent(s) played, wear their hair like their parent(s)or dress how their parent(s) dress. Parents who love their kids unconditionally will let their kids start to lead the way when they get to an appropriate age to be able to choose things (babies for example can’t lift their heads up fully let alone point to what they want to wear). And often times those are going to be cisgender traditional clothes because our society presents that the most.

I think because S has not been vocal for the LGBTQIA2S community, it’s easy to assume the gender role is pushed on L. If she were to be more vocal regularly (as often as sayI brand partnerships she had in pride month), it would at least make it easier to believe L has a choice.

Like if you are going “which princess dress do you want? this one or this one?” instead of what do you want to wear (and show a website or let them walk to any part of the store to choose an outfit) it fosters a safe space for kids to express their gender with clothing. L could very well be super happy to be “girly” (looks very happy), and hopefully as L grows, S will honor whichever gender expression L chooses.

This is what I love to read! People HAVE to call out S and her friends who legit get sponsored for being nobodies who post mediocre content littered with overspending and supporting products if slavery and genocide! They are posting brand or affiliate codes they got for being either pretty or cis women or friends of them, and they are doing nothing! Attend a protest! Boycott! Two FREE things they can do to help but they don’t. They don’t call out problematic friends who are a benefit to them which is exactly what politicians do.

As you all know from my replies to posts I’m here to call out influencers for their disregard of genocide and rights of people all over the world.

I love these types of tops (I wear as tops not dresses) and although some will be upset at the nip showing, nipples are not sexual organs and bras are awfully uncomfortable for a lot of people (post top surgeries, mastectomies, breastfeeding bodies etc). All bodies are actually awesome (and I’m not in social media accounts lying about it to exploit people for it though). Some people wear modest clothing, and others don’t but it doesn’t give or take away their value. What does take away their value us buying fast fashion, flying everywhere, supporting genocidal brands and bragging about it. So although I don’t hate this outfit, I hate that she still remains silent about things she should speak up about like genocide, slavery, exploiting workers in sweatshops, LGBTQIA2S rights etc. I remember one of her friends coming out and saying something like well “If she speaks up about stuff, people will doxx her” but she’s literally telling 2 million people where her whole family is).

Yes it’s very weird, because people have been asking influencers and celebrities to boycott Disney for almost 10 months. Everyone should boycott Disney. Given the fact that these influencers are on their phones, 18 hours a day, you’d think they know who they should be boycotting but apparently not.

Boycott Disney, period.

I also wanted to add that, although I have never had any type of injections, my friends who get lip injections have complained about getting cankers, and I know one time when I was using crest white strips. I was getting cankers all the time with white strips and didn’t make that connection. They are extremely painful, and I don’t wish pain on anybody. Honestly gargling with warm salt water helps so much!

Yes! Also acidic foods (yes coffee is acidic) and cola as well as any lemonade, spicy food, strawberries etc hurt and can make cankers worse. Do not drink coffee or cola when you have cankers. Rinse /gargle with warm salt water several times a day and they heal very quickly. Rinse your mouth after eating acidic foods too if you can’t resist.

trigger warning eating disorders A lot of medication’s can cause cankers, as well as stress, and I remember having cankers all the time when I was suffering from ED (bulimia) even after rinsing and brushing right afterward.

Also, having someone in the dental field in my family I will say get screened for cancer at your dentist appointments and know the signs of oral cancers.

My feelings on how these people dropping in feel:

People who abandon their friends who have kids not at the same age when you do are trash anyway. Superficial internet posted friends are just that- it’s the real ones people keep hidden to maintain privacy. I am private on all social media but I have friends who don’t want their photos anywhere online even on private anccounts, and almost all my friends refuse to have photos of our kids online anywhere. It’s possible this mom friend has simply not shared her connection to avoid people creeping on her family. I ask my friends with larger followings to never have me tagged or in their pics. It’s a boundary that most of the world keeps, which is why we see the redundancy of these influencers everywhere.

No she’s there. I have an account I didn’t block them on . She’s likely blocked you then.

Not that it will help, but a lot of us (like me) are here to call her out on her refusal to call out things like genocide, and her refusal to say anything to support the LGBTQIA2S community or body autonomy (I see from Sam, her other comments that you’ve posted on that you are not OK with people being complicit in genocide, and this influencer has been completely silent , even endorsing products on the BDS list).

This isn’t a celebrity. This is someone who built a platform by selling crummy products to people, to the point where she’s made a name for herself, and has the means to use her platform to help a lot of people, and she is just continuing to be greedy and unethical. I attend protests, donate to community organizations and volunteer my time, and I definitely am active politically. So when I see people who are white cis privileged women being amplified over marginalized people who are making a difference in the world o call it out.

I wouldn’t stress about any of them blocking you because they just do what they think will preserve their images.

As for AM well AM’s hubby told someone to literally unalive themselves, and yet A’s friend F has had 2 siblings pass this way. Most of the shine people are openly sober but AM was going to push booze. AM threatened to punch someone and was working with anti violence organization.

B supports an incredible trans account (this is good news) who had their t-shirt designs stolen (this is awful, and we should all be mad) and yet S&K t-shirt company that B used for her viral water thing uses designs that aren’t her own (for the S&K pride merchandise). Go look at the more pride less prejudice, frog umbrella one and the angry woman one- they are all over the web and are dated before launch). B took down the links to help stop genocide to put up merch link.

With mental health posts they get $ from organizations too. They still buy Disney, Coke, Amazon, all of which are complicit in genocide.

These friends are all about consent but S is not cool with consent. The friends are mostly all against showing their kids or child relatives, but S isn’t and they are okay with this. S doesn’t speak up for pride, trans rights or genocide but B & AM did (B removed link, A only posted half-assed thing in fall then a link but showed no contribution). So I think friendships with S and shine people have seemed to lower moral compass.

There’s more, but they aren’t worth worrying about. Let’s call them out for disappearing stories when it’s anything of substance, pushing links for environmental damaging food and clothing companies and just overlooking bad behavior.

Would you be upset if you were in high school and you called out a mean girl for bad behavior but then got cancelled or ignored by her friends? No you wouldn’t. Treat this like high school. After high school (or adulthood with superficial friendships with popularity or financial benefits in this case) people discover themselves and either get worse or they improve themselves. I think, let’s let these adults figure out that they are contributing to problematic behavior and let’s let them show that they can grow.

In the meantime keep calling them out (as you should in real life too), attend protests, contribute to mutual aid, donate your time to worthy causes, stop over consuming and ignore these people. Look for community in groups even like this if it’s all you can do, to search for people who are looking to disrupt the status quo. Let these ones figure out life a little longer.

They can block and we can too. I suggest blocking anyone that is harmful to your mental health. It could be perhaps that them getting called out or they are looking for comments that call their friends out causes them mental distress because they aren’t ready to face the facts yet. And ultimately if it’s not good for their mental health, they will have to block you too. To an outsider that seems really silly. You would think that when people are making suggestions to become better people that people will try to take strides, but it’s often once they’re through the fog that they will see the error of their ways.

I realize that we all have to somehow take part in capitalism and a lot of things people can only get by going to big box, stores, or Amazon, but I always think it’s a big win for the planet and a loss for billionaires when influencers post less about consuming. I never actually want influencers to over consume and thereby influence others yo do the same. I’ll give credit where credit is due and I hope this is a trend that continues and that all the other shine people also stop pushing everyone to buy all the time. Little victories for the planet are little victories am I right? We need less fast fashion (instead let’s support local and small and NO s&t isn’t small) , more activism (or even some activism like speaking up for Sudan, DRC and Palestine, and trans kids) and less trips (local shops need influencers to give them business to drive business). When I see even small changes I HOPE they are moving to being more authentic (I won’t get my hopes up too much but you never know). Calling people out on snarks is the only way they can see what people think and it’s necessary to demand more from people on platforms.

Prediction: it will be the arrae (that brand that apparently fixes bloating instantly that no doctor will recommend). They are now pushing a “faux-zempic.”

We don’t need brand collabs with blonde white women influencers, we need influencers talking about Indigenous History Month, Pride Month, genocide and boycotting. But sure. Let’s see another collaboration.

I’m not really into swimsuit clothing that don’t cater to non-cis people, plus sized people or people requiring modest coverage. There are brands out there that offer longer suits, ones with more coverage for people needing modesty, and suits with accessible features etc. Of course, no clothing brand can do it all, (well, they can, but they choose not to because they’d rather collab with white and white presenting rich cis women). And like I said before, asking a member of the LGBTQIA2S community , or BIPOC artists to design patterns might seem performative, but pride month , Indigenous History Month and Juneteenth aren’t new. They (along with all clothing companies) should be pressured (by customers) to be reaching out now, for next year, and paying people accordingly. Seeing the suits on the same bodies and influencers all the time also doesn’t give anybody an opportunity to see what they would look like in the suits.

Her heart is wiser? Then she should speak up about Palestine! She should post about trans rights AND keep posts up. A wiser heart would Boycott Coke instead of putting it in her stories. A wiser heart would stop flying everywhere when the world is on fire and climate experts have said FLYING is AWFUL for carbon emissions. A wise heart would know to stop buying clothing constantly from companies that are having their products manufactured it countries that are not monitoring labor policies and water usage. A wiser heart would not put their own kids on a public account for strangers to see. I frankly don’t care what she actually looks like physically.

Whoa! Consent is EVERYTHING! Omg I unfollowed her and the friends all ages ago for lack of care about anything of substance, but I didn’t know this was also something that had happened! okay this doesn’t sit well with me at all. I don’t want to see the recording I trust this is something that would be out there plus non-consensual anything could trigger people affected by SA trauma. I’m not weirded out by people’s different “things” they are into (everyone is different when it comes to what makes them “happy”) but body autonomy is body autonomy! Partners need to be okay with everything. No means no, and that applies to a partner not being into something taken as something that shouldn’t be brought up or suggested again.

What?!