My parents had puppies when I was born and I used to roam around with them all day. The day lil baby me discovered that I could access the milkbone cupboard, we feasted like kings.

OP you have to be my favorite username to see on lemmy when I’m looking for a good entertaining post. Keep up the quality memes!

Hey, you’re insulting the precursor of the revered kekw, back before kekw and lol were two separate words

She is beautiful :) thanks for sharing

I get around this by setting my passwords to something easy to type like *******

Completely unrelated, does anybody know why my bank balance always goes back to 0 immediately after my paystubs are deposited?

I felt this way until the first time I had a tomato that had never been refrigerated. Turns out that the enzymes that make tomatos taste good denatures at fridge temps, and makes them taste like grainy mush. If you ever get a chance to try a fresh tomato, I can’t guarantee you’ll like it but I can guarantee it’s a significantly different taste and texture than the cold ruined tomatoes you find at a grocery store

I’m trying to remember the brainrot memes from my childhood but I can’t because I am le tired

The packets: “I want to get off Mr Bones’ wild ride”

Disclaimer: I’m a straight cis man, but I have/have had quite a few lesbian friends over time who have explained this joke to me. Take my explanation with the appropriate grain of salt

“the dating pool is tiny to nonexistant” is a common complaint I’ve heard from lesbians I know, probably related to the fact that I’ve mostly lived in rural areas. Given the low availability of partners, its more common to jump into relationships quickly and really commit to them. I’ve also heard a lot of “I really want somebody to live with me so I don’t just choke on something and die”. Probably less common nowadays, but I’m from a generation when it was harder to be gay publicly --> harder for lesbians to find roommates. Living with other women often meant being stigmatized by straight women that don’t understand lesbians are people and not just sex crazed harlots, and honestly that but worse because of a higher threat of violence with straight men. I’ve heard that moving in with a romantic partner as a lesbian is a move that lets you have a roommate with less objectification related to your gender/orientation. Again, idk how much of that is true today, but that is my understanding of the origins of the joke

Hell yeah! Can’t wait to see your post when you pull it off. I lost that freerunner on f23/24 to a misjudged blast wave that knocked me down the chasm into a big room with a scorpion out of vision. I still think it could be a winning seed if not for my skill issue lol

I have a run 2 challenge run

That might be able to come close on 2 challenges right now. I haven’t been playing it as an equipment restricted challenge, but this build feels insane and only really relies on darts, free-runner talents with the cloak, and the ring and wands. Plus seeds to tip the darts. Most of the kills are “shoot corrosion, freerun and/or stealth and/or blast wand away, finish kills with darts after letting the orange cloud of death do its work”. The armor doesn’t matter because you never get hit and the upgrades I spent on the crossbow could go into the ring or the wand if you were planning it from the start. MDV-GYJ-SFX if you wanna try it, on shattered. The challenges are hostile champs and badder bosses

Looks like a banging cheap/lazy meal. If you can find it, a thin BBQ sauce like Bachans makes a beautiful glaze on spam if you squirt a bit on right as you drop the spam in the pan

Afaik this is how to make a Cuban espresso. I was taught to mix the sugar with the first few drops inside the moka pot, but I’m sure it would do the same thing mixed in a glass

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China is full of shit about it being unintentional, they’ve been playing grey zone games for quite a few years now and the nations around them have caught on. I’d argue missile deployment is exactly proportional to an unplanned breach of airspace by a military asset. It’s historically a pretty good idea to build up your defense when a neighbor is brandishing their military on your borders

Quarks are forever ruined by the decision to get rid of the truth and beauty quark nomenclature in favor of top and bottom. Iirc it was done because some physicist was afraid of a headline “physicists fail to find truth” when they were trying to prove the existence of the top quark

Hey it’s me, the 3 scorpions and 2 succubi waiting for you at floor 23 on the way back up. Hope you don’t plan on keeping that amulet without a fight!

You ever start replying to disagree with a comment and then realize the things you’ve normalized in your romantic past are a bit fucked up? That’s where I’m at right now

I’ve had sex plenty of times I didn’t really want to in the past. It goes like

She’s horny and wants to fuck. I am not

If I say no it’s a self esteem meltdown

If I say yes it’s a bit of a workout that ends in cuddling, which I always want

It’s just always felt better for my life to be an on demand dick machine than somebody who can say no

I quit a physics phd path just under a decade ago because my experimental results were turning up negative and the uni I was at pushed me to doctor my results so we would keep getting funded. I also wonder about this