100% this. Even if the closest friend I have told me they were suicidal, I’m not sure how well-composed my response would be.

OP, I’m sorry you’re going through this, and you deserve to feel better.

My advice would be to try not to antagonise other people for what they haven’t done, even if you maybe expected more. Life is pretty weird, and honestly, people with depression can be difficult to deal with. I say this as someone who is/has been that person. I am not proud of how that’s manifested in my social interactions sometimes.

You never know where someone is in terms of their emotional capacity. They could be depressed themselves, which could lower their empathy. They could have had a really rough week, which may have made your confession untimely for them. Who knows.

It sounds like you feel really lonely though, and honestly I would either 1) talk about that specifically over your depression as a whole, or 2) put yourself out there in community or hobby-related events and meet new people to form bonds with.

I wish you the best.

I am autistic, and honestly OP, I feel very similar. But based on the comments, I’m starting to think that we’re both narcissists haha

I have this particular issue with a house mate who is self-obsessed and wants to do nothing but brag about his charisma and intelligence to anyone who dares come downstairs for a split second. He’ll go on for hours, and re-tell everything if someone else comes in. He kind of caricature-ises this whole experience for me. He has trapped me in a convo for so long that I’ve had evening plans ruined, even after telling him multiple times that I’ve got to go. No point pretending with him, you literally have to just ignore his existence and leave. Grim.

With friends and family? It depends.

For friends, I care if they’re very close (1 of a handful of people), not because of the topic itself. What I’m really listening out for is how they have been affected by the experience.

For more distant friends, acquaintances, colleagues… generally no.

I thought it was a class/wealth thing, not a culture thing. But I could very well be wrong.

Based comment

I am not a trans woman but I was hoping I could chip in with a bit about Finasteride as I used to be on it.

Finasteride is not a general anti androgen, but it does block DHT, which is what some T gets converted to and is the most potent/effective form of T. I’m a guy and I was briefly on it for hair loss but I stopped because it made me depressed (dysphoria) and I also felt a little weaker. So at least from my experience, I would call it an anti-androgen, even if it works specifically against DHT.

One side effect of finasteride reported by some men taking it is breast development, so I would be very surprised if it has anything to do with what you are noticing with your chest.

Have you had a blood test recently? If that’s all good, breast growth can take a long time (several years), and ofc the full extent of it varies from person to person.

I’ve been getting freckles on my body in similar places that aren’t exposed to the sun. I always thought it was related to age rather than testosterone, but who knows! I don’t mind them personally.

Just thought I’d put it out there because I feel like it would be neglectful of me not to: minoxidil fucked my skin and aged me by a good 5-10 years. And I was only using it topically on my scalp for balding! The effects on my face would have been from the residue on my pillow as I roll around in my sleep. I can’t imagine what would have happened to me if I put it on my face. Look up “minoxidil collagen breakdown” for more details; I’ll spare you them here, but taking minoxidil for 1.5 years is one of my biggest regrets.

There is very little data on the likelihood that this impacts someone taking it, mostly bc the hair restoration industry is extremely quick to silence anyone who complains of any kind of side effect. I was even told by the Dr who prescribed it to me that I was “imagining things.”

Whether you heed this caution or not, I wish you the best in your journey to glorious beardom.

Thanks. Yeah, I don’t think their comment is entirely accurate.

If anything, at least in my case, being a “tech nerd” almost acted to validate my gender when I was a kid, and vice versa. I would have had a harder time had I been into something more traditionally feminine, because my family/other transphobes would point at it as evidence that I’m not “really” a guy.

The original comment is probably well-intentioned, but it honestly doesn’t feel very far removed from just using “AFABs” to refer to a social group, which makes my skin crawl. I and many other trans guys’ upbringings are quite different from cis women’s.

How are trans men excluded from tech?

(Not trolling, genuinely asking. N.B. I am a stealth trans man in tech.)

Is the “wrongness” that you feel with presenting as male purely an expression/conformity thing? If you could dress and express yourself as feminine as you feel on the inside, would that be enough? If so, then you might be a non-conforming guy. GNC people, whilst not trans, do have a fair bit in common with trans people in terms of existing in a society that has a largely close-minded understanding of gender.

Otherwise, does it bother you to be referred to using masc terms (like “son”, “brother”, “father” etc.)? Are there parts of your body that cause you distress, because they don’t line with what you expect or think feels right? If yes, then you may benefit from experimenting with labels under the trans umbrella. Only you will be able to determine if it feels right, but without trying you may never know.

Someone… likes the Reddit app?

I was going to comment this exact thing lmao

I’ve come back to this after sleeping to check; has anyone figured out what the hell this means?

Is this article a joke or dead serious?

This is some real “the right can’t meme” type shit… why is it getting upvotes on blahaj.zone?

My brain sharted trying to trace this through

Fwiw I’m a trans man and I also work in tech lol. I didn’t see the survey. I’m stealth irl and don’t spend much time on trans communities/subs online either. I think this might be fairly common

What does this even mean

I don’t think it would change my day-to-day life now as a transitioned, largely stealth, reasonably happy person. However, I’d still say yes for 2 reasons:

1. First puberty was jarring and made irreversible changes to my body that I don’t like. The experience was traumatic and it’s something I really wish I could live without
2. My gonads making testosterone would be much more convenient than relying on my memory/discipline lol

I may have said no if I got puberty blockers in my early teens, but I was nowhere near that privileged.

I had so much trouble understanding pubescent girls in the media, how they were so excited to have their first period or wear their first bra. I thought everyone experienced the absolute dread that came with puberty and they were all just pretending. I was fully expecting to get a huge growth spurt one day and grow to be 6ft tall and look like Jim Morrison. It felt like someone had made a mistake and it would correct itself naturally.

God this is relatable AF. First puberty was honestly traumatic for me.

I hope you feel better on T now :)