• Diabolo96@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    12
    ·
    1 year ago

    This was the weirdest comic I ever read, not complaining tho. But while the comic isn’t that bad , the punchline ( i geuss the old dude wanting to leave the home ) fell flat. I think you should’ve stopped at the ghost leaving the house because he got weirded.

    • selokichtli@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      9
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      edit-2
      1 year ago

      I did like the ending, more than what you suggest, but it’s not the weirdest comic I’ve ever read at all. Maybe it’s because I was sympathetic with the character in the punchline.

      EDIT: Re-reading the comic, I think the expression in the last frame might be omitted? Instead of “me too”, the character could be the same as in the previous frame, with maybe just a graphical semiotic expression of some emotion, no words, no facial expression. The punchline for me is “I still think we should move”.

    • Thisfox
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      1 year ago

      Yep the ending is weird and not very clever.

    • CustardFist@feddit.nlOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      1 year ago

      Thanks for the review, Diablo96. Most people don’t even bother to comment.

      About the ending: if I’d stopped with the ghost leaving, then that would’ve made it come eerily close to a happy ending and I don’t like happy endings. I’ll go out of my way to avoid it and happily add a few panels to turn it bad/sad.

      • Diabolo96@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        edit-2
        1 year ago

        Welcome !

        I’ll go out of my way to avoid it and happily add a few panels to turn it bad/sad.

        Oh, My bad then. Maybe another repetition panel at the middle to serve as some kind of last chance before disaster and to emphasis on how stubborn thr old guy is would’ve been a nice addition. For exemple : you could add/replace some of the panels in the middle with ones having the old woman trying to stop them from entering but the husband says, “no, I am not moving out.”. Also, the two panels before the smack feels a bit superfluous since it doesn’t add any info that the clothes and previous panels don’t show far better.

        Hopefully, you don’t take it as me telling you what to do and just consider them as advices.

        • CustardFist@feddit.nlOP
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          6
          ·
          1 year ago

          No man, it’s fine. Your have the right to have your own opinions.

          As I said before: most people don’t bother to analyze and/or comment on my comics. It happened a few times during the pandemic, but when that was over, it happened less and less.

          I always welcome constructive, well formulated criticism. It helps me to improve.

          I hope you stick around for more comics. ‘Bط