• McLoud@lemm.ee
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    3 天前

    She was planning on having 5 km of cock run on her, now her plans are ruined.

    • ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca
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      3 天前

      This is almost exactly how I found out my ex-wife was cheating. She bought a ticket to a concert and then freaked out when I bought one too. Why wouldn’t I want to go to a concert with my wife? She said it was just going to be a thing with her friends from work. When we arrived there was exactly one friend from work. A guy friend.

    • superduperpirate@lemmy.world
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      3 天前

      Because I’m procrastinating at work:

      How many sessions of coitus might it take to accumulate 5 km of cock thrusts?

      Estimates:

      • average erect length: 13 cm (from Perplexity.ai)
      • average number of thrusts in coitus: 300 (ibid)

      Calculations

      • thrust distance per coitus session: 13 cm x 300 thrusts x 2 (accounting for insertion & removal) = 78 m
      • coitus sessions to accumulate 5 km of thrusts: 5 km / 78 m = 64.1 -> 64 sessions of coitus

      So OP’s wife would have to fuck 64 times to accumulate 5 km of cock. Even with amazing refractory periods, that’s still a minimum of 32 guys running a train on her.

      Edit: working through this reminded me of that episode of HBO’s Silicon Valley where they started talking about handjobs and hotswapping dicks and hit on middle out compression.