Or, alternatively, what did you do to another person which got you blacklisted from their life?

  • linuxduck@nerdly.dev
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    1 year ago

    Family started to make fun of my pronouns. I’m just tired of people choosing to be cruel for cruel sake. So I deleted Facebook, essentially cutting them out.

    My mom refused to use pronouns and I’d given her 6 years to learn and grow, cut her out.

    In the past, a coworker on purpose set up a birthday for one of my best friends and didn’t invite me. They made up super weird reasons why I wasn’t invited. I realized he was manipulative… I cut him out…

    Another co-worker was a friend but then one day he wanted to start touching me. I don’t like being touched. I kept asking him to stop, he did it more. Til one day he pushed me into a cold case (we worked at a grocery store). I cut him out.

    Regardless of who I cut out though, there is ALWAYS room to come back if they change and grow up.

    I’m still hoping my mom will before she passes… : /

        • Maharashtra@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          I assure it isn’t.

          Family shouldn’t be treated like random strangers you meet online and have some minor disagreement with.

          And if you think otherwise, you deserve the same answer.

          • dfc09@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            We don’t know the full story. I’d generally agree with you that family is more important than random strangers, and we should make more effort with family that we would with strangers. But that only goes so far, and the family members need to be making similar efforts, it can’t all be the children’s responsibility to retain good will while the parent routinely damages the relationship.

            The OP already said they’d given their mom 6 years, that’s clearly the “family” effect, they have their mother many many more chances than they would a stranger.

            I don’t know what your relationship looks like with your parents, hopefully it’s lovely, but once you’re an adult the power dynamic needs to change dramatically. My parents no longer control me and can’t tell me how to live my life. They can provide advice, which I generally cherish because they’re more experienced in life than me, but if they try to strongarm me into their choice like they did when I was their legal charge, I tell them “NO”

            • Maharashtra@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              We don’t know the full story. (…)

              I agree, and if it was explained in detail that the family is in the wrong here, I’d probably agree on the separation being the reasonable choice.

              But it wasn’t. It was presented in a childish, scornful “in yaaaaah faaaace” way, supported by exaggerated generalization along the lines of “all x who y should go f* themselves”. This is wrong. This is wrong on so many levels, that it’s actually painful to see how one could fall so low and act like it’s ok.

              I don’t know what your relationship looks like with your parents, hopefully it’s lovely, but once you’re an adult the power dynamic needs to change dramatically. (…)

              I recall Stalin’s Iron Wall. And am a father myself.

          • Moonguide@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            OP didn’t cut off her mum because of her identity, they did so because their mum didn’t respect them or their wishes. Have a good day, dude, you’re a lost cause.

            • Maharashtra@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              The dude cut off his closest family, because they didn’t fullfill his wish and it’s correct.

              Do you even give some thought to what you’re writing?

              Have a good day, dude, you’re a lost cause.

              That’s precisely how the guy chose to act, yes.