I’ve noticed a distinct sharpening of the satire at The Onion since it changed hands.
I didnt know the onion got new management but seems like its working.
It got bought by a group of super fans who specifically formed a company just to buy it and return it to its former glory. They even plan to bring back ONN!
Edit: the company the super fans formed is called Global Tetrahedron Corp, which long-time The Onion fans will recognize as the (now formerly) fictional global megacorp featured in countless past articles.
Finally some good news
YAY
Oh that would be really good!
Management has layers. It’s complicated.
In my opinion, the funniest thing about the phrasing of the headline:
It would just straight up make it illegal to be a woman of color in Florida, which might be the republican goal irl
Now you’re getting it
No, they’re allowed to be of colour. They just need to produce white sons somehow.
It’s technically possible for a woman of color to have white children, due to Punnett square shenanigans. Not likely, but it has happened.
But there’s also the issue of the timeline. Age of consent in Florida is 18, so (assuming no other laws are to be broken) this would require even white women to have an average of six kids in four years. Which is…also improbable.
Indeed, I know someone who looks like she’s a mix of black and white. Her parents look black and her brother looks white.
Jesus, I almost ate that onion. For a moment, the headline shocked me, but wasn’t that unbelievable… and that, in and of itself, is terrifying
Thank you for this comment… double checked the sub lmao. This showed up in my feed.
Yup. Fuck.
Sounds exactly like something they would do.
Alabama has the same law but they must simultaneously be half-brothers
And the onion is back out ahead of the curve (I hope)
This is so on point and explains their anti-immigration policies perfectly.
As I’m sure pudding fingers will be inspired to make this into an actual law, and as I’m sure he doesn’t know what “ex post facto” means, I look forward to seeing this applied to my over-22-year-old childless sister.
It took me a minute to figure out who pudding fingers was. There are so many doughy politicians.
Lab grown meat is banned but eating babies is now legal. Florida is crazy.
