It was sometime in early 2022 that I found myself reading a few romance novels. I remember being mildly annoyed about how most of the books had instant chemistry/attraction as part of the plot. Then I suddenly found myself wondering, how do I feel if and when I feel attraction? I think I have probably never felt instant attraction. When I look at a good looking man/woman I just feel an appreciation for their beauty, like how I would feel looking at a beautiful painting or photograph. At most all I feel is a wish is to look at them a few times more than is appropriate. I don’t remember how it feels like to feel attraction towards someone I have feelings for. The last time I felt strong feelings for someone was many years ago and I can’t recall my feelings now. I am very curious to know how other people feel when they experience attraction towards someone. How does it feel physically, and what thoughts and/or feelings do you experience? Also, do you consider chemistry and attraction to be the same or different? How?

  • @blujan
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    37 months ago

    I once felt this, I assumed I just found her pretty and so I liked her pretty much instantly but getting to know her was even better.

    I think attraction is more or less instant and chemistry is a day to day thing.

    I ended up having a normal relationship with someone else, and had I not known how different that is I also wouldn’t be sure that the descriptions in books can be real. Just feeling like you belong somewhere and not wanting to move from there, it’s a real feeling and it’s blissful.