• sad_detective_man
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    4 months ago

    Oh. Brutal. Maybe I needed to hear that, there was a part of me that waited for way too long for “found family” until recently. Maybe at least I don’t have to feel bad about giving up on that

    • cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      3 months ago

      It’s not a judgment on whether you should or shouldn’t, but the more you leave in place the standard o0enness to/reliance on a thing, the more not having it is going yo hurt/disable you. That’s not to say it’s a binary. There are creative adaptations and shit¹, and sometimes its smart to hold out, its not purely scar tissue/bleeding. More like having a room for someone to stay, and cleaning out their shit yo be a mechanical room or gym or torture dungeon or whatever. No value judgment here; I’m not your mom.

      ¹with their own cost in alienation and legibility

      • sad_detective_man
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        3 months ago

        No, that’s sound. There’s a lot of lip service paid to how fundamentally wrong and what a moral failure it is to ever be lacking something. You know, like in the current crisis of meaning that men in my culture are widely experiencing. But very little discussion about what addressing that lack even looks like, so I appreciate your weighing in. Also for not judging my torture room.