Capitalist solution: Which ever of the two lever people that has the most wealth gets to pull their lever. The other gets a payout for their loss but only if their wealth is within one standard deviation of the winner.

It’s an interesting problem but the trolley tracks aren’t really drawn right. I’d tell both to pull the lever, it would derail or slow down the trolley since the other wheel isn’t lined to leave the track.

i’ld rather press shift-tab, go to steam library, push stop and then the uninstall button 😉

i do a sick backflip

This feels like the Joker’s gambit in The Dark Night.

There’s no way you can redirect the trolleis on those tracks. They’re not really interconnected. So the problem is only theoretical - no matter whether you pull the lever or not, the trolley will continue on it’s journey to kill your relative.