Unstoppable javelinas love coyote pee like it’s “bacon bits in their salad.” Here’s why golf courses are peeved
Golf course in a fkn desert. These pigs are doing humanity a favor.
This was exactly my thought. Most people skimmed over the part of the article that talks about the insane amount of water used annually by these fucking wastes of space. No golf courses should fucking exist, they carve out hundreds of acres of land and wipe out tons of local flora and fauna, all so a bunch of old rich fucks can get drunk every day and hit a stupid fucking ball around.
But but but! Golf courses only used 2% of the states daily water! That’s nothing!! /s
They are better ways of having a golf course in the desert. https://www.king5.com/article/entertainment/television/programs/evening/soap-lake-wa-worlds-worst-golf-course/281-99335bc7-977f-4eea-9ac5-b8fca8bd37a7
“After doing bumps of Coyote piss” was not a sentence I was expecting to read at 5:30 in the morning.
But here we are.
You gotta key I can borrow?
Nah but I got some pee you can have.
golf is so fucking stupid
Golf courses in the middle of the desert are even more stupid.
Hot take: It’s not a sport! If a morbidly obese 80 year old can do it, it’s not a sport…
If golf is a sport then so is miniature golf.
I mean, a morbidly obese octogenarian could pay rugby… Once… Briefly…
And all mushrooms are edible…
It’s a glorified game of fetch with oneself. They hit the ball and then they look for it for hours.
Why?
Good, I hope they tear it all up. Golf course use an insane amount of water, even when they’re located in the desert or a place where droughts are common.
So… I have an idea.
Maybe, if they’re a problem everywhere else, people should just trap them and… release them on the golf course.
It’s their natural habitat. Fuck you, Bryce.
What’d I do?
I live in the general area, and yes, javelinas are a constant problem for everyone. Most peoples’ yards are fenced off for that very reason.
If you’re wondering what a javelina is, it’s what the rest of the world calls a peccary. It looks like a wild boar. Also, don’t try to get bacon bits off of it; they’ve got a scent gland that instantly destroys the flavor of the meat if it’s pierced. (Even if the scent gland is left intact, it’s a toss up as to whether you’d be able to stomach that meat.)
It’s like an anti-theft ink tag. 😂
Stank tag.
The culinary portion of this comment seems seasoned with experience and regret.
Nah, just research. “They’re pigs, right? Why don’t people just cook them and eat them?” A few Google searches made the answer abundantly clear. (Also, javelinas just plain stink. It’s a skunk-like odor, and who’d want to eat whatever is making that smell?)
The old hunter’s joke for Javelina is “Wanna know how to cook a Javelina?”
“Dig a pit, put it on a board, roast it for 3 hours, throw out the Javelina and eat the board.”
When I worked in Peri we had a few collared peccaries around that were tame. Didn’t seem particularly smelly
Anyone with the last name “Bisbee” living in AZ should change their name. That town is a shithole.
The people who keep the name are proud of it, for some reason. Fuck if 8 know wh6
What’s shitty about it? It’s just an abandoned mining town tourist trap with artsy hippies living there. I mean it’s not a place where you’d probably want to raise a family, but the landscape is beautiful and there are a few good restaurants and bars there.
I’ve always enjoyed my time there on a couple of roadtrips, but maybe you know something I don’t.
They’re also called javelinas in Texas.
When they say “wild pig-like animals” I immediately imagine some sort of gang of never before seen tribal pigmen.
ManBearPig. It is half man, half bear, and half pig.
Are you being cereal?
I’m super cereal
Oh no, the 30-50 feral hogs!
It wouldn’t surprise me if someone down there pulled out an assault rifle on the golf course and started blasting.
Quick way to land yourself in deep shit 2ith Game and Fish lol. Hunting is pretty well controlled here
My golf course only takes 5w30 hogs maybe that’s their problem
They’re not feral hogs. Javelina are a different species all together.
convergent bizarro new world not-hogs
In a desert state like Arizona, a golf course is an abomination from the word go. Let nature have their way with it: They provided a wet paradise in the desert, and the animals come to make use of it.
#TeamJavelina
Piss on your local golf course today!
Can confirm: Am delighted.
Back in my day you’d be lucky to see a javelina. Now you just want to kill em. Must be fuckin’ nice!
We ought to leave this world behind
If my wife were here, she’d tell you that there’s a special place in heaven for animal lovers.
They are mean, especially if the piglets are around. I’ve been charged by them. Its pretty common for dogs around here to get maimed by them. You can smell them from like 200 feet away, too.
Sound a lot like boar lol
that’s really unfortunate. if only the private country clubs could afford to repair the golf greens in the desert.
I read that as wild pug-like animals at first. Sounded cute.
